Yes, Another Stupid Blog

The past tense of the future.

2006-04-30T00:54:00.000-05:00

Things grow worse. I find myself unable to change the fate I am doomed to live. Despite my hopes and childlike dreams of a life I feel I should live, I realize the nightmares are happening. Never before have I felt this alone or lost...this hopeless or devoid. It's evil what I feel. It's a despair that inspires the knife to the skin, a poison to the stomach. So dark are the shadows that my spirit has no chance to reach the surface. Everything at this point is against me. An empty, hopeless shell inhabits this life, and continues unwaveringly into a dismal ahead.

I never imagined I would live this nightmare, for it is the life of the already dead. I cannot at the end of the day ascertain what drove me to reach it. In every turn I see the dark and it's outstretched arms, lightning bolt shaped straight to my soul.

I've shed everything and stand forlorn in a gray cold world. What am I to do next? How do I find the way out of this hell I have found myself in? What claws strike at my spirit and aim to destroy it?

Is my destiny short and without the certainty of old age? So far, nothing has been what it should, so why should anything be as it should after?

The paragraphs languish smally as idea fades into oblivion.

Of nature's canvas

2006-04-16T02:48:00.000-05:00

I stood out beneath a starry sky and marvelled at the view as I gazed upward like a child. I couldn't help but feel trivial in the grand scheme of things as the sky reached upward far beyond my vision's grasp. The moon was beautiful as it hung slowly in a far off place. We take it for granted just how amazing it is that another world presents itself daily to our apathetic selves. The sky is our greatest, forever-changing canvas, able to wield upon it the most truthful and natural colors. We can only hope to dream of the reds and blues that streak across a setting sky, and their colors defy anything that we could dare to capture even in visions among our slumber. Can there be anything more enrapturing than a sky that paints upon it's infinite edges a shade of color that seems to stretch without limits beyond the range of our sight? The warm whisper of summer's calm breeze pushes us to shudder at the magnitude of nature's ability to convince us that there still exists beauty and perchance, a god with a masterful artist's stroke. Where the ocean and sky meet is the place that we may never wake to.

To continue...

2006-04-05T01:12:00.000-05:00

Wow, reading my last blog entry I realize the desperation of the situation. Yeah, it's pretty bad. Things are definitely for the worst now, despite admittedly valiant efforts to remedy it. I've tried, but things beyond my grasp have thwarted my attempts at a satisfaction.

The money situation has not worked out as planned. I seem to have far less than originally projected. Has it been worth it? Yes. Because living on my own has seemed like nothing more than normality, meaning anything but has been abnormality, to put it simply. Nothing better than coming home to a kingdom that is to be forged as I please.

I look forward to Superman Returns. I hope it's good. Right now, it seems like a dream. In fact, I have dreamed of it often as being a totally disappointing movie. It cannot be this. I think only the totality of the Star Wars prequels have equalled the excitement I have for this film. I want to believe a man can fly...again. Superman the Movie was a film that defined my childhood and I have many fond memories of it, including this one. In my tendency nowadays to re-connect with the aspects of my childhood life that made me happy, this film is a perfect conduit. I hope to have the same near limitless expolsion of excitement watching this film as I did when watching the original over two decades ago.

Well, that's all for now, folks. I have more, and so it will be continued very soon.

2006-03-26T02:08:00.000-05:00

I haven't written anything of value lately because there hasn't been anything of value to write about. I can't really describe how I feel now, because franky I've never felt like this before. I thought I was past the age of discovering new emotion, but I learn harshly that I am not. I feel like life is a big empty hole, and I am being dragged into it piece by piece, minute by minute. As I am pulled closer, my sanity and livelihood are stripped like meat from the prey of some great predator. I've tried to find something that I could hold onto, to climb away on, and I realize the failure in this. There is no escape, only mere postponement of the inevitable.

The true nature of life is a very painful blow to the reality that we cling to. Many are fortunate to fill their life with enough things to absorb this blow. Some of us, however, are not as lucky. And we reel fully when it finds it's devastating mark upon our spirits. I didn't think life could be this dreadful way.

Sometimes my anger and frustration drown out my rememberance of time, so that at the end of the night, I find myself confused at what happened beforehand...at what took up so much time. It's been beyond the powers of my memory as to when the last time I felt joy or happiness. So much that I tend to doubt their existence. There are so many things that could remedy that, yet they're as far away as I am from the moon right now. It only adds to the load of despair that hangs heavily on me all the time.
It affects my sleep, my habits, my hobbies, my thoughts. It's like a great leak that seeps forever into every facet of my life, without end. There's no proper way to fight it. It's an evil, cheating, bent-on-murder opponent who cannot be stopped.

And this is the true nature of life; that there is no true nature. There are only those that are happy and those that aren't. Those that succeed and those that wake up one morning and realize that they haven't. Those that wake up without regard to life and those that have a closer regard to death. Those that see nothing but light and warmth, those that can't help but to shudder at the darkness and cold that greets them every day. Life doesn't care, it doesn't help. It can be a calm stream or a brutal killing river.

It's late now. I have to find a movie that can perchance help to shrug off this overwhelming feeling of utter despair I have now. I need something that can help me forget. I need something that can remind me that hope may actually exist, because right now to be honest, I have serious doubts. I may be up all night...

We'll see...

2006-03-09T01:37:00.000-05:00

One begins to see beyond the hollow transparency of life, like the clear plastic cloth thrown across some old person's furniture. You can't touch it, but it's there. You wander about and reach, but are quickly admonished by life's superintendent...and with a smack upon the hand, set about undiminished but fearful. Who are we to question life's design, we are set upon it's path without the capacity to question it -- with suspicion on my part I may add. Maybe one sober day I can decipher the encrypted ramblings of my soul. Until then, I have to deal with it's incomprendible side effects, which echo into my mind like madness. I can't rip it out like some unseemly splinter or some ill-placed speck of dirt. Why does life trip us up and send us spiraling confused into the puddle of our spilled memories? What form has this life? What purpose serves our existence...or vice versa? Why are we here but to suffer and take from that the means to postpone further suffering? I cannot accept that our being is mere coincidence from the collision of nature and some unforseen intervention. Who's stage do we dance about in the pursuit of that which makes us feel better about existing? Do they laugh at us? Do they critique our performances? Do they mock and jest like drunken clowns at our many misfortunes? Something here isn't right, and it will kill us to discover the true nature of why we are here. It is our trade off. Why is there sadness or frustration or madness or depression or anything that rots our mind. Oh well... I give up.

The Battle

2006-03-06T23:56:00.000-05:00

The battle for my own life has begun. There are no heroes or enemies or medals. There are no victories or defeats. There are only two possible outcomes; life or death. This is the most important battle and I must be ready, for it could be the last one.

Banninated again

2006-02-14T21:34:00.000-05:00

This time, I was suspended for awhile from the Home Theater Forum for calling out a forum moderator on his rude behavior. This guy is a jerk really. Some poor poster made a thread about a topic that already existed and this mod replies with a smart ass little remark about the search feature. So the guy replies in the existing thread and I reply after, stating that I thought the mod was rather rude. BUT I also contribute something meaningful to the topic. Lo and behold, my post is very prompty deleted (like within a matter of minutes) and I get an email from the same mod (what a surprise) that I have been suspended. The email contains NO reason or violation notice, nor does it tell me how long I'm banned for. Asshole.

So I send the board owner a very well articulated, perfectly respectful email about my situation and how I feel that the mod in question has been unable to hold himself to the same standards that he holds forums users to (and later bans because of). He can make a rude comment and when a poster does the same -- although in my case, I wasn't so much as rude as beligerent I suppose -- they gets banned.

I've noticed that the jerk moderator has a tendency to be rather rude and impolite to forum users, especially when they upset him greatly by opening an existing topic. Maybe he was abused when he was a young forum poster by his oppressive forum moderator father and now he's exacting revenge on the cold, cruel, double-posting world one ban at a time.

Still no response from the forum owner.

Thank fuckin god!!

2006-02-02T23:07:00.000-05:00

Finally, my 'Upcoming Films for 2006' list is DONE. It only took two months : / I'm still working on my 'Best of 2005' list, which should be done before the year 2219 (hopefully). Now I can post my sporadic drunken ramblings freely again.

I've been sick for the last four or so days. Nothing much, just my yearly sinus infection that tortures me. I'm about over it now and I go back to work tomorrow morning for the first time since Sunday. I can't wait to get back to my usual routine. Feels like I've been gone or something.

This month has been Bill Hell Month. Cell, power, and cable bills are all higher than usual, not to mention insurance. Everything is paid right now and I have a little left over for food, gas, and/or beer.

Upcoming films for 2006

2006-01-30T23:00:00.000-05:00

Like before, I will be updating as I become aware of potentially interesting films. It looks like a pretty damn interesting year coming up, with alot of bold projects that could make or break things. There are alot of familiar faces behind the projects and the potential for either greatness or complete failure is seperated by a razor-thin line. Superman Returns tops this list as my most anticipated film of the year, and is also one of the most anticipated films of all time for me.

Apocalypto - Mel Gibson has big brass ones. I think his movies get progressively better. While not at all religious, I found The Passion of the Christ to be a wonderfully realized version of a story told countless times, but this time with a brutal flair and a wonderfully mystic visual style. The trailer has a funny easter egg that disrupts the serious nature of the work. Is that Saddam? You'll know what I mean when you see it.
Trailer

Casino Royale - I'm a Bond fan but of the Sean Connery era. I thought Pierce Brosnan made an excellent Bond, but everything with the exception of Goldeneye was crap that got progressively worse. I mean come on...an invisible car??!? And now that Brosnan has gotten the rather abrupt boot, they've got relative newcomer Daniel Craig reporting in as the new 007. I like Craig...but not as Bond. He's just too -- I don't know -- rough to be Bond. He's more suitable as the bad guy. Like Star Trek, this is a franchise that's in dire need of a vacation for awhile until some worthy material can be gathered. While this backtracking of material is a nice move (Casino Royale is an actual Ian Flemming novel, his first in fact), I think it would have been wholly appropriate (and awesome) to make it -- ceremoniously -- Brosnan's last Bond, as Craig I think lacks that 'cool' that this movie will probably require in spades, pun intended. But as will be a common saying with many of these upcoming films, we'll just have to wait and see.

Clerks 2 - Kevin Smith movies are fun and stupid. I like most of them even though they're certainly not pinnacles of modern film. Supposedly, this one is for Jason Mewes, who Kevin Smith promised another role to if he stayed off the junk. Looks like it worked. I hope they shoot this one in black and white also, and try to stay close to the 'shaky' look of the first one. There is a small trailer out, and all I can say is that a dancing Rosario Dawson already guarantees my ass in a seat.
Trailer

The Da Vinci Code - I've never read the book but I am quite aware of the controversy, especially among the bible thumpers which, as always, makes it interesting to me. Sound cast and crew, especially my future wife Audrey Tattou. I really like Tom Hanks, but I would have preferred someone else, maybe Harrison Ford as supposedly the main character was based on. Ron Howard has come a pretty good ways lately, and I was surprised at how much I really liked 2005's Cinderella Man. Trailer looks interesting.
Trailer

The Departed - First of all, this is a remake of a Hong Kong action film called 'Internal Affairs', which I have yet to see. Second of all, the cast looks absolutely spectacular. Thirdly, this is Martin Scorsese. It's a trend that alot of these older generation directors seem to attach themselves to the 'it' movie stars of today (like Woody Allen and Scarlett Johansen) which I don't think is a good thing, especially Scorsese's 'attachment' to Leonardo DiCaprio. He's not a bad actor, it's just that he has been unsuitable in past Scorsese films. One of the reasons I disliked Gangs of New York was because he was so unconvincing as a badass-come-hero and came off as nothing more than a pretty boy with some terrible facial hair. While The Aviator was a great movie, DiCaprio did NOT capture the presence and stature of Howard Hughes in the least. I was never convinced I was watching Hughes; more that I was watching an actor portray him in an entertaining, 'golden era of Hollywood' way that I could forgive. But since I'm a mostly forgiving person (and I don't know anything about the material), I'll give him a chance in this one. The cast is simply amazing though. Jack Nicholson? You've sold me already, chief!

Flags of Our Fathers - World War 2 has had a large focus put on it lately, especially with the European Theater. It looks like the focus is beginning to shift to the Pacific Theater, with 2005's The Great Raid sort of signaling that change. In addition to this new project from Clint Eastwood, we also have a new HBO miniseries focusing on events in the Pacific from the makers of the truly great Band of Brothers, entitled simply The Pacific War. Flags of Our Fathers tells the story of the brutal battle of Iwo Jima from the American side, and the heroic, famous flag raising atop Mt. Suribachi that would become not only a result of the success of the battle, but immortalized in one of the most famous images in history. Most incredibly, Eastwood is also working on a movie at the same time that deals with the Japanese side of the event, entitled Lanterns in the Wind. Supposedly both films will be released at the same time. If this is true, it's an amazing opportunity to see two sides of a conflict in such a close proximity of time, making for a much more objective view of the time. It's a tactic relevant to any time in history, but especially now.

The Fountain - Very few movies have gone through production hell as badly as this one. Darren Aronofsky's previous works, Pi and Requiem for a Dream, are great movies and show a real strength towards visual style. From the trailer, this one looks to be the same if not more. The imagery looks simply amazing, and Aronofsky knows how to put his characters into bizarre and oftentimes desolate situations.
Trailer

Miami Vice - Two words : Michael Mann. This guy is amazing and already has quite the track record. Last year's Collateral was excellent and from the trailer for Miami Vice, it looks like Mann is going to once again going to demonstrate his ability to capture the essence of a location as well as imbue the fim with a realist rawness. Like Collateral, this is being shot on HD DV instead of film which gives the film a realistic, less filtered look, so to speak. I don't like Colin Farrell and think even less of the murderer-supporting Jamie Foxx, but let's hope they can bring a freshness as well as a throwback familiarity to the Crockett and Tubbs characters which is already embedded in most of our 80's culture-ridden minds.
Trailer

Mission Impossible III - It's more of a curiosity than anticipation. It's a shame for Tom Cruise that he can't escape his offscreen antics like his character can escape life-threatening situations. I think what they've done to this franchise is typical of the treatment of older material with it's disgusting revionism. The show was about the team; this franchise is about Tom Cruise, nothing more. It's a ballsy move casting Phillip Seymour Hoffman as a bad guy, and I can't tell if it's an attempt or not to lure in those type of movie viewers that normally flock to his types of film.
Trailer

The New World - I still have yet to see anything by Terrence Malick other than The Thin Red Line, which is one of my favorite movies of all time (probably in the Top 20, if I ever make a list). I love his attention to nature and it looks like this one will convey that detail as well. Word has been good on this one, and all indications are that it is a multi-layered, deeply meditative attempt at bringing to life that era and the characters who braved the dangers of a new world. A very sound cast, including Christopher Plummer and the always great Christian Bale. But then there's Colin Farrell...again.
Trailer

Rambo IV - I admit it. I like the first two Rambo movies. The first one was an enjoyable, moody, violent flick about an animal that had been pushed into a corner and was now striking out against an entire town. It's a nice movie to watch when you feel the whole damn world is against you. The second Rambo was a finely tuned action movie that is extremely entertaining and features one of the finest movie scores ever (RIP Jerry Goldsmith). The third one is pretty much garbage, with only the Goldsmith score and some exciting helicopter chases as redeeming points. In a two-punch combo, Sylvester Stallone has announced he is attempting to resurrect two very 80's franchises (or nearly, in one instance), with Rambo IV being attempt one along with Rocky Balboa, or Rocky VI, being the other. In this newest Rambo adventure (wow, never thought I'd hear myself say that!), the titular warrior goes up against skinheads when a girl is kidnapped or something like that. Now why they don't send him back to Afgahnistan to battle terrorists is beyond me. But this new Rambo, just like the new Rocky, sounds like Rubbish.

Rocky Balboa - (Note: this one is listed as a 2007 film) File this under the same 'trainwreck curiosity' categogy as Mission Impossible and Rambo IV. The first two Rockys were very good movies. The franchise gets worse as it goes along, except for Rocky IV, which was strangely imbued with a lively and intoxicating spirit, plus an excellent training montage. Rocky V...well, no need for explanation. So now 16 years later, a nearly 60 year old Stallone has decided Rocky's story just isn't finished yet. Or he needs more money. So once again Rocky steps back into the ring to get nearly obliterated by his opponent before 'going the distance' to finally win. I wonder if Rocky finally learns to block in this one. From what I've read, this looks like it's going to be as expected; an unnecessary sequel to a long since dead franchise that will do nothing to change that fact.

A Scanner Darkly - Yet another movie based on a book I haven't read. The trailer intrigued me quite a bit since this film is shot very non-conventionally (although done before in films such as Waking Life. The film is shot with digital video and then animators meticulously trace over the live action, or rotoscoping. Why they don't just use the live footage I'm sure is a question for the ages. However, it makes for a very surreal viewing experience which is quite beneficial, especially for a story of this caliber. I'm very curious about this one.
Trailer

Superman Returns - This film is notorious for being even worse in production hell at one time than The Fountain. You can read a pretty thorough history of the production of this film here. It's gone through countless directors and actors, but finally settled on Bryan Singer who dropped X-Men 3 for this. That's bad for X-Men, as Brett Ratface Ratner is now in the director's chair, but it should be a very good thing for Superman. It's hard to describe exactly how I feel about the Richard Donner Superman movie. I absolutely adore it. It's by far my favorite comic book movie and it's also a perfect example of a nearly 'magical' film that just oozes with charm, spirit, and warmth. I'm love/hate with Brandon Routh who is the new Superman. No one can even come close to Christopher Reeve, but sometimes depending on certain pictures or blurbs about Routh, I'm convinced they might have done their best in an attempt to find someone worthy of picking up the fallen torch. While I like the fact that they're planning on using themes from John Williams's INCREDIBLE soundtrack to the first Superman movie, I don't understand why they didn't simply get Williams back on board instead of having John Ottman incorporate the themes alongside his own new material, which surely will be more numerous than the original score in the film. Just going on source material, this is my most anticipated film of 2006.
Trailer

V for Vendetta - I'm finally about to get the graphic novel. Supposedly word is very good on this. Too bad they couldn't hit the November 5th date ("Remember, remember the fifth of November...", watch the teaser to see what could have been). Hugo Weaving is awesome. Early reviews (here, here, and here)from Ain't It Cool News (yes I know, grain of salt alert) have been overwhelmingly positive as if they have perfectly captured the novel and it's message. It's going to be interesting since this novel deals with a terrorist as a protagonist who is trying to usher in the overthrowing of a facist government with a tendency to use murder and explosions to make points. It's marketed like an action movie, but if it's like the book -- and the aforementioned reviews note that it indeed is -- people may be disappointed that it's more of an insinuation of action and a deliberately-paced examination on how we percieve those that are in charge. This film is my second most anticipated film for 2006.
Trailers

X-Men 3 - As noted, I think this film is doomed. Badly. Ratner is nothing more than a fratboy with too much power, and I doubt seriously if he can pull off a comic book film after the pop dreck he's been churning out. And to add insult to injury, this appears to be the final entry in what is a severly underdeveloped trilogy. From what I know through script reviews and the like, it looks like they're cramming this one with too many things going on and too many characters. It's like the film is made of many little stories instead of being one cohesive narrative which leads me to believe this may not be the team-oriented picture that it should. It's a shame. With the success of Batman Begins and the potential of Superman Returns, it looks like DC may take back it's dominance from the 70's and 80's and hold onto it for awhile.
Trailer

Steady as she goes...

2006-01-26T03:05:00.000-05:00

My thoughts drift to cool, jewelled sands, glimmering beneath a gloriously golden sun, waves gently tapping at the beach's edges. The infinite reaches of a infinite world stretch out far beyond my sight's meager grasp. I stand and bathe in the wind's warm embrace, and the surge of life taps me on my skin warmed by the sun. The air is electric. The sound of the world whispers to my spirit. The sky above is a blue that exceeds my perception of perfection. I can feel nothing but an absolute joy that only childhood once brought.

Perhaps one day this will be a thought lived and not longed for. I can only hope to see this day instead of dreamed of.

New Years....groan

2006-01-01T21:47:00.000-05:00

Well, you could consider it better than Carrot Top, but that depends on if you like Mean Girls and Mulholland Dr. and The Cosby Show. On their own, they're fine. But at 1 am and on -- and on New Years DAY -- they're not fine really.

I finally got home just after 6:30 a.m., then had to be at work at 2:30 p.m., which wasn't a problem really. I know a guy that had to be there at 7 a.m., and supposedly he didn't get home until 5 a.m.! Gorsssh! I was a little tired so I can only imagine what that guy felt like!

It was sooo stupid how they scheduled for New Years. First of all, they scheduled all of the full-timers, and since they obviously make more than the part-timers, that's just more money for the stupid company to pay out. Yet they continually understaff us and/or bitch about not having enough money to schedule the people we need. Secondly -- and worsely-- they scheduled the OLDER, OVER-AGE PEOPLE to work. The younger kids, who aren't supposed to legally enjoy New Years, WERE OFF!!! Iddddddiots!

Another New Years come and gone.

Proceedings

2005-12-30T23:21:00.000-05:00

Well, tomorrow is New Year's Eve. So far, every New Year's -- from watching Carrot Top on Jay Leno to watching someone shoot a tree with a paintball gun to sitting at home because I have to work early the next day -- has SUCKED. There are plans brewing, so in a change of pace, I will remain optimistic.

My first New Year's resolutions are always to have a better next New Year's. I hope to announce that next New Year's will be celebrated through the use of explosives and incendiaries. I know no reason why the gunpower treason should ever be forgot.

I'm slowly working on my lists for the year. Ugh.

Why is it that people can change so much in such a small amount of time? They can go from being good friends to what I would call 'barely acquaintances'. This happened to me recently. I met a nice person and we seemed to be hitting it off wonderfully. And not even two weeks later, things have changed completely. I don't understand it. From a warm shoulder to an icy cold one. Maybe it's karma, I don't know...

I still love this place. The freedom....is...overwhelming. The new car smell of my own little liberty is still fresh. However, it seems I now have neighbors in the other side of my duplex. I was awakened at 6am almost precisely to odd little dull rumblings from the other side. I hope this isn't what I will come to expect from now on. I've become addicted to the substance of silence that flows through the veins of my sleep.

Well, time to rub the rest of the night off with a nice little movie. And no, that wasn't meant to be sexual in nature.

Perv.

Upcoming posts

2005-12-25T16:35:00.000-05:00

I am working on a "Upcoming Films for 2006" post which is nearly done. I also plan on posting a "Best Films of 2005" hopefully before the new year. I suppose I could review my own personal year as well as post some goals for the next one.

In an experimental endeavor (which usually results in bad stuff) I'm going to try and create a directory for all of my posts, such as a listing of my posts under a heading like 'film', or 'job', etc. It should be interesting.

Social vampires

2005-12-22T23:20:00.000-05:00

I know a few social vampires, as I like to call them or maybe they already have that name. These people go around and 'attach' themselves to a person and pile on the affection and attention until they feel satisfied that the person really likes them in return. Once that happens, the person inexplicably moves on to the next person nearly instantly and begins the cycle all over, leaving the last 'victim' confused and maybe a little hurt. This usually stems from a feeling of lack of popularity and/or a rabid desire for more attention, moreover embedded in a childhood experience that gave rise to such feelings early on. Maybe they really like this person or not; it doesn't matter in the grand scheme just as long as their desire and appetite for attention and affection is satisified on an immediate level. In doing so, they may also acquire a larger friend base that can be used offensively towards the next victim making themselves look popular and thus making their own 'value' appear to be greater. It's a vicious efficiency to a villainous methodology that may leave in it's wake much despondence.

Unfortunately, as one of the weapons of the social vampire is to woo through an excess of adulation to a point of disorientation, it is very difficult to identify one before it's too late, moreso to prevent actual victimization. One cannot resort to a pessimisitic state suspicious of any and every one in order to prevent such an occurance as it is detrimental to a prosperous life. However, one can exercise increased discretion when dealing with new acquaintances and be aware of rapidly advancing stages of friendships and/or relationships.

Oh well

2005-12-20T22:49:00.000-05:00

I don't think I really want to finish part II of the whole 'worst days' bit. Frankly it's just too embarrassing and painful to think about, and I'd just assume forget it as well as this last cursed weekend that thankfully is over. The haze of confusion and desolation from it still lingers now.

My power did finally come back on...Sunday night. So until then, I had to go back to where I lived last for a few boring days...even stayed in the same room.

These past nights haven't been pleasant. Every single night since Friday, I've been plagued with this anxiety-attack like things that are really terrible and have prevented me from getting a really good and deserved night's rest. They are becomming less severe though. Friday night is the very thing that is causing me to not write the follow up as well as the reason for these nighttime attacks.

I hope it's over with, although I doubt it going by my recent luck. I have to be at work at 6am tomorrow and I need sleep tonight. This could be a rough night and if so, followed by a rough day as well. Luckily I have a few days off after tomorrow which I will definitely need.

I hope it gets better.

The Worst of Days

2005-12-17T23:41:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, Friday the 16th, was my worst day ever.

It all began Thursday actually. My power went out around 8:30 am and I awoke to the resulting silence and a slight coldness. A winter storm was supposed to hit and a quick dash to the window confirmed this. Nature had rendered the world outside my window completely in ice which continued to fall. Trees and branches sagged towards the ground, ice heaped upon them. I went back to sleep after adjusting to the silence and awoke a couple of hours later. Still no power. And it was getting colder. I went outside and walked through my backyard; the ground was hard and slippery with ice. The sounds of trees and branches snapping was frequent in the cold air.

I could see just beyond my backyard a branch that had fallen onto a power line and which had caused it to sag dangerously to the ground. That explained it.

I went back inside where it was getting colder seemingly by the minute. I had very little food and nothing to do, so after awhile I decided to leave and head for work early. I figured (and would be proven correct) that some people would have called in so I'm sure there would be no problem getting in earlier than my 4:30 shift. Food would have to be the first thing I found.

While the roads were safe from ice, it wasn't safe from fallen branches and trees. Nor was it safe from inoperative traffic lights. Traffic, filled with people leaving work and/or making a mad dash to the grocery stores, was terrible. The was alot of power loss, and many restaurants and fast food places were closed as a result. The ones that weren't were crowded with people. I managed to get some food but it took a good 40 or so minutes in the drive-thru to do so. I was right there at work so I decided to call and ask if I could come in. Of course, no one answered so I had to go in and hope for the best. I did manage to get in early.

I was worried though. I was scheduled to leave at 12 midnight. Would I have power and where would I go or what would I do if I didn't? I had to be at work at 10 am the next day (which was actually 6 am before I made them change it) so last minute emergency plans would be difficult to come by at such short notice. We close at 11 pm for the holidays, so in an unusual and surprising move, they let us leave at exactly then. There was some obvious outages throughout town as I made my way home and so the hope was alive. As I got closer and deeper into the east side where I live, everything looked bright. Looked pretty much like normal...until I got to my road.

The stop lights were out and the road I turn onto led into complete darkness. Not a single light was visible, save for the occasional candle flicker in an otherwise dark window. My hope fizzled.

My house wasn't much warmer than outside. It was dark and very cold, and I didn't know what I was going to do. I talked to a friend for over an hour which did alot for my spirits. Eventually I would throw a couple of blankets on and after finally managing to go to sleep, I would wake up to an even colder morning. It was hard to sleep though, as bits of cold air would find their way into my mountain of blankets and wrangle me from an uneasy slumber.

A phone call from work woke me finally and I heaved the blankets off to shiver my way to the shower, where there was barely any warmth at all in the water. I shivered more.

I needed gas and it took a few tries to find a gas station that wasn't closed down or overran with gas-hoarding capitalists. I also needed food but couldn't find a place that was not busy. It was a great start to what would be a terrible day.

To be continued...

The story continues

2005-12-12T21:49:00.000-05:00

I've definitely strayed into some strange new territory with a resolution yet unknown. It's a little too premature to discuss. We'll see what happens as usual.

I have a backlog of people I need to call back. These holiday hours at work have been killing my 'me time' badly. If you're one of the 'waiting few', I will get back to you. Please be patient.

I'm currently working on another 'upcoming movies' list. If that ever gets done, I've got a 'best of 2005' due eventually.

As far as the creative hobby goes, we've got several projects lined up, including a samurai thing that has the potential to be awesome. We're still trying to get the paratrooper short off the ground (no pun intended I don't think) but I'm rather apprehensive about it ever doing so. That's just my usual paranoia mixed in with my pessimism though.

Everything at the home front has been status quo. I'm still working to fulfill some of my self-imposed obligations. It's kinda hit and miss right now as I'm too busy enjoying my 'absolute freedom'. Perhaps that is part of the problem. I think once the newness of the situation wears off, I'll be more inclined to take up the burdens of my own expectations. The new year is but around the corner...

Good Night, and Good Luck

2005-11-23T14:50:00.000-05:00

I saw Good Night, and Good Luck on November 6th, so here is a late and brief review.

In short, excellent film. Director and star George Clooney does a magnificent job of taking us to the time period and it really feels like you're peeking into the actual event instead of watching a movie about it. The black and white, mixed with the constant swirling of cigarette smoke that seems to permeate most of the film, gives it a gritty yet realistic feel. The script and dialogue are all top notch and very naturalistic, adding to the documentary-esque feel to the minimalist presentation.

The cast is also outstanding. Clooney actually turns in a -- dare I say -- understated performance and is quite comfortable not being the center of the story. Everyone else from Jeff Daniels to Frank Langella is equally fitting to their roles. The real star, of course, is David Strathairn. I haven't seen much footage of the real Edward R. Murrow, but it is apparent that Strathairn put alot of effort into capturing his charisma, professionalism, and plain larger than life presence. He completely vanishes within the role. It would be a great disservice if Strathairn didn't pick up at least a nod come this February for his performance.

If I had any complaints, it was that the film was too short. At 93 minutes, it just rockets by. The fact that the story is so strong and the performances so incredible doesn't help either, as you become so pulled in you won't even think once of the time. It's a good thing though, as the filmmakers chose to simply tell the story with as little exposition as possible, so that you are focused on the event itself as if you were watching it unfold in real time on the television. Some old vintage commercials strewn about help convey this as well.

This is a terrific film and anyone with any interest in historical subjects -- especially one as important and relevant as this one -- should see this. Let's hope it gets recognition come Oscar time.

A crap day

2005-11-22T18:33:00.000-05:00

Although the release of the new X-Box 360 wasn't nearly as bad as I thought, the rest of the day more than made up for it.

After the whole thing had settled down, we began to work on getting everything out as we had a huge backlog of product that was in the back as opposed to out on the sales floor. Our fat ass (literally) supervisor, who is perhaps the laziest woman in the world, actually had the gall to bark at us all day and complain that we weren't working fast enough. I wouldn't mind if it wasn't for the fact that she did nothing but walk around the whole time and impatiently give orders, save for a couple of times when she was around talking to people. If she was so concerned about us getting done, she could have put down the snack that was no doubt making her large ass even larger and help us out. No matter what you do, she still finds something to complain and bitch about. Everyone is so tired of it.

She is never in our department; the question of the day is always: "where is she?" She goes on break several times a day and usually takes very long lunches. Last night, I came in before she did and worked my ass off in preparation for today. It was shortly before time for me to leave for the night, and I never even got my little break. Of course she was nowhere to be seen. But I did see her; hanging outside taking a smoke break while everyone else was inside busting it so she wouldn't complain about us again.

She's getting on my nerves...badly. I could go on and on about how lazy and hypocritical she is.

My knees have been giving me alot of trouble for the past couple of days to where I have developed a slight limp that I have managed to hide. I guess I overdid it one time jogging. Anyway, they were really hurting today. It got to the point where I just wanted to lay down or stop walking altogether.

I stayed over a little today as I usually do before I finally left. I bought Battlefield 2 : Special Forces, an expansion pack, and looked forward to playing it. Unfortunately, it looks like it really sucks. The maps are pretty drab, and the experience of playing as a Special Forces soldier is really not that different from playing a regular soldier, especially when everyone else is playing it too. That's nearly $30 down the drain...

My frustration was slightly abated when I realized I was getting a rental from Netflix in the mail today. I've been rather iritated with them lately as their service has drastically slowed to where I don't seem to get as many movies anymore and on top of that, within a month, I've received two broken discs. But it's hard to get mad when I've been seeing as many great movies as I have recently thanks to them. Well, wouldn't you know it, today I get a rental and it's also cracked. Supposedly, they check these discs before they're sent out to the next person. So they either don't give a damn or are too stupid to realize that just because the disc isn't in two or more pieces doesn't mean it's playable, especially when you have a huge crack running the entire radius of the disc. %#$^^&!!!!! I was looking forward to watching Westworld tonight.

It looks like Charter never disconnected my service from my last residence when I moved, so I probably will be charged two bills. I tried to call today, but my phone was dead. As soon as it's charged, I'm going to call them and let them know the err of their ways. At least Netflix isn't as shitty a company as Charter is...yet.

Oh, and it looks like my phone is now recieving...spam. Yes, spam.

I could use some beer tonight but I haven't decided if I'm going to actually go out and buy some. On the other hand, it probably won't make me feel any better and will most likely make me sleepy, as I had to be at work at 6am and have yet to nap. Plus I need to save my money. I just don't know...

This week

2005-11-21T01:28:00.000-05:00

It's bad enough that this Friday is the dreaded "Black Friday", but we also have the release of the X-Box 360 this Tuesday. Suffice to say it isn't going to be a very fun week. For those not in the know, I work retail.

Microsoft didn't seem to make enough 360's (or they're using one of their usual ethical tactics, maybe undersupplying to create demand) so I'm sure we'll get the fucking morons who can't fathom that I as a lowly employee have no control over supply and demand and they'll whine an cry and cuss at me that they waited hours and hours only to leave empty handed and without their precious overpriced gadget. Like I give a damn. They can take the money they don't blow and buy a violin or a crate of tissues. There will probably be people trying to jerk units out of other people's hands and what not and maybe even a few fights. I don't care, but if anyone gets an attitude with me...well, I'll just say I'm not one who necessarily subscribes to the "customer is always right" philosophy because...well, they're usually not. People will lie, cheat, whine, cry, racewhine, etc. to get their way, and this is especially true when it comes to shopping.

Black Friday is the reason why the human race is badly in need of extinction. People wake up extremely early (or don't go to sleep at all) and rush out to wait in huge lines in the wee, cold hours of the morning so they can save a few measly fucking bucks on crap. Then they rush in like bulls in Pamplona when the doors open and fight -- yes, FIGHT -- for that last electronic nose picker that's on sale. When they're done violently scouring the earth free of any cheap on-sale merchandise, they wait in mile long lines that wind several times around the store. It's funny because there is always some simian (usually many) that still complains! This retard knows that it's the busiest time of the year, they see the lines, the bustling crowds, yet they still have to whine as if it's going to make any difference! God, I wish they issued us automatic rifles.

I heard from an old friend/roommate a few days ago, and that's a good thing. My local and current friends are my friends, but I don't hear from them much anymore. I don't know what the deal is, but it's been such a long friggin time since I've truly hung out. It just doesn't cut it anymore. Sure, I'm still on board if we ever do anything with the website in the future (such as films or projects), but I need friends who want to actually hang out with me and do things. I just do not have that now anymore.

Speaking of the website, it seems like things are just plain dead there. There is very little activity on the forums and there doesn't seem to be a real interest or desire to do anything productive. We've discussed several things, but no action has been taken to even start things back up. I know we're all busy, and things could possibly pick back up during the summer, but it just feels...dead.

Our DVD was sent out a good while back and while we did get some positive feedback, it seems that our efforts may have been mostly for naught because of a completely stupid and thoughtless error as far as the DVD itself goes. We had the one main feature on it as well as the rest of our smaller projects. The problem is that these smaller projects were located within a section of the DVD called 'extras'. Now not many people really care about extras, and there was no way for them to know that these weren't typical extras like some stupid doc, but in fact whole other films! That one word, 'extra', has undermined our efforts; I know personally because I had to tell someone that there was alot more stuff in the extras section! Now I brought this up beforehand; I knew it since I sold DVDs and had been into the format since '99. I knew it because I deal with alot of customers and I hear it all the time that they "don't care about extras".

I knew that this 'extras' business was going to be bad. I wasn't listened to and it turned out that I unfortunately was right. It's distressing and upsetting and just plain inexcusable.

OK, I guess I've bitched enough for one post. Lots of stuff built up so there had to be a release of some sort. I know it's my problem, and this is just the start on how I'm going to deal with it. Writing it out helps. I've fixed one huge problem (home). Now it's time to fix some others.

I don't work till later tomorrow, so that's good. Right now, I'm going to go throw on a flick and soon after, hit the sack. It's going to be a long week...

Jarhead

2005-11-20T22:06:00.000-05:00

In a trend that's becoming more and more common, I went to see a film by myself today again. Last time it was War of the Worlds, which was a barely passable popcorn flick that should and could have been alot better. Today it was Jarhead, the new Sam Mendes war film starring Jake Gyllenhaal, Peter Sarsgaard, and Jamie Foxx set during the first Gulf War.

If every second of every war was filmed, I imagine most of those movies would be like Jarhead. In other words, those expecting another Black Hawk Down or the film version of Battlefield 2 will find themselves quite disappointed. Those looking for a unique perspective on war wrapped in a very well made, well acted movie will find themselves pleased.

Jarhead is based on the novel by Anthony Swofford, also the main character played by Jake Gyllenhaal, and his experiences as a Marine. As mentioned, this is not a typical war movie; it's more about what soldiers do when there is no enemy to engage, when their foe is boredom and impatience. In a very telling scene during a movie showing, the Marines cheer as the Air Cavalry swoop from the skies in their Hueys and gunships, 'Ride of the Valkyries' blaring, during the famous beach assault scene from 'Apocalypse Now'. The Marines want to fight in this war but most of this war is about waiting and killing time, not the enemy.

So far, Mendes has a very impressive track record. This film continues that streak and actually shows a little growth, especially with character focus and depth. He also knows how to shoot a film, and the cinematography in this one is a great example of that skill. Whether it's the color-bleached shimmering of the overwhelming desert or a night exterior illuminated only by the backdrop of burning oil wells, the movie is always visually striking.

In another albeit partial credit to Mendes, the acting is top notch. When Swofford is interviewed by the media, the film stock changes accordingly and Gyllenhaal does an absolutely amazing job of making us think he is indeed the real Swofford conveying his fear and cynicism on camera. That, and his performance throughout, was completely convincing, and a good indication of just how great an actor he is. Sarsgaard is also impressive in a more understated role with the occasional emotional outburst that shows his own range as well. Foxx is very entertaining as the hardcore Marine lifer Staff Sargeant with the foul mouth. Everyone else, including a grown up Lucas Black (the creepy kid from the X-Files movie), fills out the rest of the cast believably.

I thought this film was terrific and a nice departure from most war films. It was a welcome perspective that was seemingly realistic and tangible. While there is no way for anyone that hasn't been in combat to know what it or it's conditions are like, this film does a good job of helping to convey just one of the many aspects of the experience.

Superman Returns

2005-11-17T21:18:00.000-05:00

Today during Smallville, the teaser for Superman Returns debuted. Until Quicktime gets a better version, you can download this one in the meantime. It isn't very pretty and is rather small.

The teaser begins with the track from the Superman - The Movie soundtrack, "The Planet Krypton", and you hear the voice of Marlon Brando, as Jor-El, deliver a line from Superman - The Movie. You see several familiar images (if you've seen any of the footage from the Superman Returns blog) followed up by completely new footage of Superman flying and hovering in space above the Earth, before shooting back down towards it.

It definitely was a teaser. I don't know yet if I enjoyed it or was disappointed by it. I was at one time a huge optimistic regarding the film; everything from the director to most of the cast is spot on. I'm not sure about Brandon Routh as Superman though as he seems just a little too... boyish for the role. There is no way they can ever hope to get anyone that comes even close to being half as good as Christopher Reeve, but it seems they could have done better than this. I'm giving him a chance by not outright condemning him; but I can't say that first impressions are positive. I do think that Kevin Spacey will rule like Zod as Lex Luthor. I was pleased when I learned that they will be incorporating John Williams's terrific score, but a little let down when they hinted that it would be used sparingly. Not their words, but it was what I inferred.

As far as the teaser, it wasn't much. There were only a few things I hadn't seen as I am keeping up to date on the production through whatever means possible, whether by the blog or this thread on the Home Theater Forum. I did really like the last couple of shots of Superman flying against the backdrop of an overwhelming sunrise as well as the pan around shot as Superman hovers above the dark earth, Williams score soaring appropriately. The film looks dark, not in content, but the way it's shot. It's dark. I'll download a higher quality version soon and comment on it in more detail later...hopefully.

It probably would be appropriate to explain my fondness for the first Superman movie. I don't have time to really do it justice, so I will instead point you to this previous post I made on that sad day that Reeve passed away. Hopefully I can expound upon my feelings for this new Superman as well as the reasons why the old Superman movie is one of my favorites in a future blog.

I have to be at work very early for the next couple of days, so it's going to be hard to get on here and update. I cannot wait for the holidays to be over and done with... *sigh*

UPDATE Warner Bros has posted the teaser here.
UPDATE #2 Quicktime has indeed updated their site with many different versions (quality-wise) of the teaser. Go to the movie's blog site homepage to see them.

I designed a banner!

2005-11-11T23:06:00.000-05:00

I'm trying to be a 'jack of all trades' while keeping the 'master of none' retort firmly in mind.

Anyway, here is the banner:

State of stuff

2005-11-08T19:40:00.000-05:00

I actually moved in on Saturday at the end of October. I didn't have internet for nearly a week, but as of now, everything is pretty much done, arranged, turned on, etc. There are a few issues to work out and a few more minor things to buy/fix, but so far, everything has proceeded pretty well...surprisingly. I moved in earlier than I thought and the move itself was for the most part smooth and timely.

Now that I have been here for over a week, it would be a good time to give my first impressions of not only the place, but the decision to move itself.

First off, this place is great, considering what I am paying for it. It has two bedrooms and each are very spacious, as is the living room. The people who lived here last were apparently unfamiliar with cleanliness however, so it's taken alot of work to get this place liveable. There's still some work to be done, but not much.

The privacy and space is intoxicating. No people stomping around or slamming doors (a problem with the last place) and no occasions of despair at the very small distances between the walls (also a problem with the last place). I can watch my loud movies on my surround system as loudly as I want and anytime that I want. It's a freedom I've never known before...and it's beyond my powers of description.

The shower is too loud, my dryer doesn't fit in the laundry "room", the heating/cooling sounds like a jet reving up outside my house, there are some window screens missing, etc., etc., etc,...

I'm happy. And I think that's the most important thing at this moment. And that's what I'm going to sign off this post with.

VICTORY!

2005-10-19T21:03:00.000-05:00

My exodus begins...

It's getting closer

2005-10-14T20:35:00.000-05:00

I went and looked at the 'prospect' today and well, suffice to say it isn't a 'prospect' anymore. Looks like a shack, and that isn't good. Couldn't even get the front door open which looked like it had been kicked in a few two many times. Plus there was some huge mechanical monstrosity sticking out of the wall in the living room (as viewed from the cracked and barely-there windows from the outside) that I can only assume is some heater from the prehistoric era. To top it off, some car went by and the female driver was apparently most distraught as evidenced by the profanity that was all too audible coming from the car.

I went back and she said she (my agent I guess you could call her) had a deal for me with both units of a duplex available, and I could take my pick. It's a little bit more expensive but they're pretty nice. Unfortunately, there are differences between the two units that will make a decision difficult. One is a little nicer and better kept and has better locks on the doors. BUT it's pretty close to a house beside it. The other one has ceiling fans and blinds, as well as a small 'hedgerow' beside it to give some boundary between it and the next house. But it was not as well kept and had the corpses of a few rather large cockroaches on the floor. And no dead bolts on the doors either. I think I prefer this one since those issues can be fixed whereas a house right smack beside it cannot not be without the use of explosives, which most people tend to frown upon strangely enough.

Tomorrow I get my review from work which is over half a year overdue. If I get a raise, I should be able to get 6 months backpay and the raise would help nullify some of the larger-than-expected rent if I choose to take the place.

On this raise it all depends.

I am being spammed!!

2005-10-13T00:49:00.000-05:00

What is the deal here? I mean it's nice to log on and finally see comments, but for them to be advertisements is beyond reproach! To advertisers: I hate you and stop it. Unless you're Steven Spielberg offering me a directorial job or Tyra Banks proposing marriage and an assload of hot hourly sex, just stop it already. Thanks and have a crappy day.

The pursuit of freedom

2005-10-10T17:41:00.000-05:00

I went to look at what I have called the prospect today. Unfortunately, I didn't get to see inside or even see which house it was for sure, but I narrowed it down to two possible houses. The agent who set me on the path of this prospect didn't call me back, so I didn't really get to accomplish my goal today of getting to the next stage as far as decision-making goes. The neighborhood is kinda odd. You go through some 'questionable' areas at first, then a rather claustrophobic array of houses, mostly old and small, but a little less 'questionable'. The two houses were both small, but one was nearly foreboding as it has the large stairs, without rails, going to the front door. The house was on a slight hill, and against the dismally gray skies, was quite eerie.

Hopefully I'll get to check out the inside soon.

Absolute freedom

2005-10-08T22:07:00.000-05:00

I've been thinking alot about this possibility of me getting my own place. For newcomers or those short of memory, go here or here and read the backstory of my current living situation.

To vacate this room is a dream. It's not only that, but essential. I have to get out and soon. The walls are closing in.

When -- not if -- I get my own place, there are some things I plan on changing. This will be a new life, a better life, a life alive with opportunity and hope for a better today and tomorrow.

First, I'm going to get in better shape. With more room, I plan on getting something mechanical or material that can help me improve physically. I'm going to take better care of myself; I'll cut down on the drinking and smoking and just plain bad living. With limitless freedom, it won't be hard to preoccupy myself with something benign and the urge to indulge in that type of thing will hopefully be abated as a result. I'll eat better again; fruits amd vegetables and a lack of food that requires microwaving or going through a drive-thru window to get it. I'll go outside alot more often, whether it's too wash my car or tend to my lawn if that proves to be the case. Sun is always good. Renews the spirit.

Secondly, I'm going to enjoy my life alot more. With more room, I can stretch out and not worry about how close the walls seem to each other. I can move around and walk about without impeding my privacy or feeling like I do not belong somewhere. I can play my movies or music as loudly as I want and fully enjoy them for once at any time I desire. If I have a porch, I can go out there and enjoy the dusk with a cool drink in my hand, and just savior the moment.

Thirdly, with happiness and satisfaction at the homefront again, I can focus on fixing other aspects of my life that are troubling. Maybe get a new job or work on some more of my usual projects. I can attempt to shake off this professional rut I find myself firmly amuck in. You can never fight elsewhere until the battle in your own homelands are won.

I can't help but to admit I am excited by this new prospect. To quote myself quoting a movie line:

"I find I'm so excited I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I imagine it's the excitement only a free man can feel. A free man at the start of a long journey, whose conclusion is uncertain. I hope I can make it..."

The situation has worsened

2005-10-06T21:51:00.000-05:00

The situation here has grown dire. I decided to make an issue about the excessive amount of rent I am forced to pay, and it worked, but only 'sort of'. Even though I negotiated a newer, slightly cheaper arrangement in secret, I fear I have stirred up hostile feelings. I have become tired of people constantly holding their hands out to me, asking for things, but turning their backs when I become the one with my hand out to them. It happens at work, at home, everywhere. I have decided I will no longer accept this type of treatment, and this initial stand will eventually become only the latest one.

But the situation is even more violatile than before. Just like with any imbalance, whether it be in nature or human behavior, there must always be a storm at the absolute worst point for the resolution to come eventually.

There is hope though.

I may have found a place to live. It sounds good, but as fate has proven time and time again, if it sounds good, it probably is too good to be true. We'll see.

I know I've been leisurely about finding another place. But no more. It's time to pick up the pace...

A Good Night

2005-09-10T10:07:00.000-05:00

I had fun last night. Nothing special; just some friends gathered at a small little bar discussing everything from Robert De Niro's career to the suckiness of the Oscars to many other things I can't remember at this moment. It was nice to get out of the house for awhile. God knows I needed that.

There's this one guy we always run into who constantly makes a fool of himself. I mean, he's a master at it. Intentionally I think. He was there of course and as usual, made a fool of himself by constantly yelling weird things. He's a virgin for a reason.

I watched The Deer Hunter for the millionth time yesterday, which is interesting considering we were discussing how low De Niro's career has sunk. I'll say now with a filmography like that, he's already earned his stripes as one of the greatest, BUT it's sad because we'll most likely never see those same level of performances because of the types of scripts he chooses nowadays. I mean come on, Meet the Fockers!!?!

I really need to write a review of that film(The Deer Hunter, not Meet the Fockers fer chrissakes), because it's one of my favorites of all time.

I have to work today, but not until 5 hours, so I have time to muck around and hopefully shake off some of this hangover. We went through alot of beer last night.

I'm off tomorrow so maybe I can do a bunch of damn posts tonight or something and get up to speed on my going-ons (or lack thereof).

TEH END OF TEH WORLD!!!1

2005-08-31T18:44:00.000-05:00

Katrina has proven to be quite powerful. She's done a nice job mucking up the fuel situation here in South Carolina. I had to pay $3.10 a gallon for gas today. Yes, that may be cheap compared to other places, but by god that's the damn most I've ever had to pay! It cost me $30 to put half a tank of gas in my car to fill it up completely. Some gas stations around here are OUT of gas completely!

My work is considering making less shifts a week with longer hours to cut down on how much employees drive. Everyone is so worried about everything down here. At least we didn't get hit by the actual storm like so many unfortunate places, and we can be thankful for that. We're much better off then some places.

Lists

2005-08-28T18:55:00.000-05:00

Don't know how popular this will be, but I think I'm gonna post personal lists in between my aimless ramblings. Favorite things, odd things I've noticed, things I want to do, places I want to see. Stuff like that. Hopefully I can start on that within the week, but as usual, don't place any money on it.

The happenings

2005-08-28T18:31:00.000-05:00

My employee video is taking awhile. Everything is there on the timeline, I just need to figure out interesting ways to string them together. It still doesn't have that spark of the last one, but this vid is many more times complicated than the last one. I still haven't found a place to host the last employee video I did. I uploaded it to Google Video and it only took them several weeks to post it, despite claiming it would take a short period of time. It's finally available, but the quality sucks and the audio is out of sync. You can wince at it here. Just hit 'play from start' to see it in it's pixelated glory. Maybe I need my own website to host this stuff.

I was sick over the weekend. Maybe still am. I occasionally feel this inexplicable wave of something wash over me, like a wave of weakness or chills or something. It's very strange and I haven't felt it before. Thought I had the flu last night. I was all sweaty, fevered (probably; no thermometer in the house to check for sure), weak and nearly nauseous. Didn't think I would be able to get up at 7am this morning to go to work, but I did. I feel better, probably because of the vitamic C pills I took. That's one reason my new employee vid isn't finished.

"The Green Lamp" (tentative title) is nearly done. Since I prefer to work on it late at night and under the influence, there has been little time to do so with my schedule. I may go out tomorrow night after an important meeting in the evening (have to go out some way!) so I don't know when I can work on it again. Seeing as to how I will probably be sitting at home once again on Friday night, I can probably finish it then.

I think I need new friends. Not to replace the old ones, but ones I can actually go out and have fun with. Seems I don't have that anymore. Don't know what happened, but my nightlife has seriously declined. Some of my friends and other people I associate with like to hang out with each other, but I'm rarely invited anymore. The last time I legitimately hung out with friends was well over a month ago! That's fine. There's actually some old friends I need to get back in contact with that I can depend on to want to hang out. I just hate it that so many of those types of friends have moved on to marriage or other places. I use to have such a good time all the time. I guess it all goes with age.

This week is another week of hell, with my schedule consisting of 7am days every fucking day. It's isn't as bad because there is a day off on Tuesday and then again on Saturday. By god I better get Sunday off as well.

Of Steadfastness

2005-08-20T20:38:00.000-05:00

I have tentatively titled my one man short "The Green Lamp", but I will probably change it to something more...menacing. It's almost done. A few more nights of attention and I can call it a wrap. There are still some things I may want to reshoot, but it's an issue of how time consuming and worth it any reshoots prove to be.

What I have affectionately dubbed "The 5 Days of Hell" is about to begin. My schedule for next week was so nice the first time I saw it. I went in early like one day, and I had a particularly busy day of the week off which was nice in itself but presented me with the option of going out the previous night with people from work and having probably an awesome time.

Then the next time I see it, they have totally fucking overhauled it out the ass and in turn totally fucking screwed me for the week. First off, I was supposed to leave at 11 pm tonight (an exception I will explain further down), and return tomorrow at fucking 7 am! And for the next 4 days, go in at 7 am! These 5 days are the worst because of what has to be done in the morning, i.e. alot of damn work! I managed to get Friday and Saturday off, BUT, for like the fourth time in a row or probably more, I have a 7 a.m. meeting on Saturday. No exaggeration, every Saturday I luck off, there is ALWAYS a meeting to go to. Goddamnit!

The reason I didn't work until 11 tonight was because I took it on myself to plan to leave at least 2 hours early. No approval; just do it. Better yet, I decided to top that by leaving 5 and a 1/2 hours early to come home to work on my newest employee video. My reasons were twofold; one the aforementioned opportunity to work on my employee video, the second as a 'fuck you' for continuing - despite my repeated pleas - to schedule me to close on night and open the next morning. I almost hope I get in trouble, which I probably won't since I got some approval, so that I could vent my rage. Oh well, I will make it so that I still get paid for the 5 and a 1/2 hours I missed.

The employee vid is going well. I think I finally have a structure for it. There's alot of footage to go through (which was a good thing!) but I am finally seeing a good path to take. I'm trying to up my production value so to speak while still retaining certain styles or certain ways of doing things. A few more days is all it's going to take, but it's going to be goddamn difficult with the way they fucked me up the ass with the schedule.

My goal is to have it done for the meeting this Saturday. I don't know if it's going to happen.

There's some other things going on; some good, some bad. Too tired and short on time to get into it right now. Maybe later.

Work continues...

2005-08-14T23:28:00.000-05:00

This past Saturday, I got to go home again for a few hours to work on my latest employee video. A theme is slowing coming together. It's a little more difficult than the last one, because that one was about putting together snippets of interviews in a creative manner. This one is much broader and much more difficult to piece together. It's a challenge no doubt, but one I will persevere to overcome.

I'm also working on a totally independent one-man short. Being shot in my tiny little room, it's something I have complete and total control over. I started on this Saturday night and worked alot on it tonight. So far, it's a little disturbing even to me. It's basically about a guy who chooses drugs over boredom with undesirable consequences. I'm taking a break from it right now to write this blog entry because I don't think I can take anymore of it. It just feels me with this...evil vibe.

Slobot got a mention in our local paper today. Not much, but it's something. It's a shame there wasn't mention of the website itself.

As far as my own personal issues, I'm trying to drown them in the bath of productivity mixed with the soap of creativity. Let's hope it's enough to cleanse me of the dirt of melancholy.

Mosquito Grove complete...web version available!

2005-08-12T22:43:00.000-05:00

Click the pic to view:

I am glad that it's done and that it came out so well. On to the next project (maybe).

I have a Hi8 mm camcorder and I may break it out to do some little independent things. I was thinking I could make weird visual things, like film around the house and get odd little things here and there. Dunno what I would do about music. Maybe sample our own stuff. The purpose of this idea is to keep me mentally sharp and the whole creative thing warm in my mind. For some reason, if I don't do anything creative in a while, it takes a long time to warm up when duty calls.

Things at work may be looking up. There was mention that we need to visually document things such as through photography and video. Since I have done several things in the past, my name came up many times by fellow employees as the proper person to do this. I was quite moved by the sentiment. It could mean that I would be doing this sort of thing alot, maybe spend half my time there dedicated to that.

I've posted my most recent work. It was a video that showed employees well-wishing to a store in Florida during that nasty rash of hurricanes that came through there and messed some stuff up in 2004, including that store in Boca Raton. That video is available here. (note: available soon)

The last weekend was our annual no tax weekend where stuff like computers and software are exempt from taxes. Instead of doing work, I got to spend most of the time filming things with a DV camcorder. It's just going to be a short little 2 to 3 minute deal with interviews and mostly funny antics of our young employees goofing off and having a good time. I plan on making it half serious and informative (with the interviews describing exactly what the tax-free weekend is about) and the other half showing work in a more 'fun' light.

Today I got to leave at my leisure, take the DV cam from work (one that's actually for sale), and go home to capture the footage to my computer. This took about 3 hours, and was it a great feeling to be able to work from home for awhile. My manager said I was a 'free agent' and I assume that means that I can take off homeward anytime I decide to work on it. I may do this again tomorrow.

On a personel level, things just aren't right. I don't know what it is, but something is amiss in my mind. I don't sleep well anymore. The last two days I didn't have to go to work early I ended up waking up around 8 or 9 in the morning, and unable to go back to sleep. I don't think this has ever happened before. Ever.

The hub-bub.com thing seems to be dying as far as the relationship with our own thing. Haven't gone (or been asked to go) to an event in awhile, and haven't posted on their forums in awhile. I do not know at this time if the whole endeavor is dead because I still think it's a chance to grow awareness of our own work, and god knows we need every chance at that. So I haven't given up necessarily although it seems like some have.

I bought me a lava lamp to help improve the mood around here. I like it.

I just don't do things anymore. It's been awhile since I've gone out with friends anywhere (what few and dwindling friends I seem to have anymore). That's mostly my fault. I need to be the one to go out and to find friends that I can go out with, and on a regular basis. There was always one friend I could count on to go out and have a good time with. It's been a long time since I've hung out with him, also my fault, and I should remedy that as soon as possible. "Get busy livin', or get busy dyin'" is a quote that comes quickly to mind.

I've come to realize no matter how much you do, NEVER expect any consideration for that when the time comes when the tables are turned. And more importantly, don't expect people to reciprocate in the fashion that you have provided or accomplished. Life is a one-way street. I guess I've always known this but I've been too damned naive to believe it.

I'm so tired. I feel emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually drained. I've been contemplating going to the beach by myself for a few days to sort some things out. I'd prefer a campsite since I have a tent and I imagine it's cheaper. No cell phone, no internet, no work, no anything but me and my thoughts.

At least it sounds like a good idea...

State of the hell

2005-08-03T23:59:00.000-05:00

Well, the video to Mosquito Grove is nearly done. All of the footage is on the timeline for Premiere and all that is needed is some creative touching-ups. It's going to be difficult however to get everyone together again to take a final swing at it as schedules - especially mine, as usual - collide and fall away from each other.

There's some personal things going on that have had me down lately. I can't discuss them, although I wish I could as it would be a nice relief. But their sensitive nature dictates secrecy. So don't ask me about it, ok? Thanks. : )

I don't know if I have mentioned this, but I have decided to pursue another residence at a much more leisurely pace. It's just too damn hard to find a place, and with the uncertainty of the future, I don't know how comfortable I am with the prospect of being completely independent. Not that I wouldn't love it. Oh no! It's just that things are bound to change soon so I need to be situated.

I really need to cut down on the alcohol. It's killing me...slowly. I can do it, it' s just that I don't want to. [ed. - Suuuuuure. I've heard that one before. Riight.]

I've seen some great movies lately. Crash (not the crap Cronenberg one), Assassination of Richard Nixon... Especially Crash, excellent film. It's very much like Magnolia except without all the pretension and hamhandedness and so overall just a much better film. Great cast, acting, direction, and everything, BUT it has the focus on the story and characters in the frame of a simply-made movie. I know that isn't much of a review at all. Maybe I will actually post a legitimate one later. No promises, though.

The Mystery of the Vanishing Flashlight

2005-07-28T18:39:00.000-05:00

Ok, this is weird. I was working on my computer and after I was done, I couldn't find my flashlight that I was using to help see inside my PC case. I looked everywhere for it. Well, I just glanced at my little table I have beside my bed and there's my flashlight, sitting upright in plain sight.

Even though that's weird, what's stranger is this is the second time this sort of thing has happened with the SAME FLASHLIGHT and involving it 'reappearing' ON THE SAME SPOT on the SAME TABLE. The first time happened two or three weeks ago.

Now either someone is using it without asking (I have a married couple as roommates) and putting it back, maybe even playing with me, or both cases the flashlight was sitting right there and I simply overlooked it. Sometimes you look too hard for something and you just kind of...miss it.

The former I could understand during the first occurance. There was about a day's length in between it disappearing and reappearing, and could have been placed back while I was at work. In fact, one of my roommates was using it right before it vanished. I asked her about it and she denied having anything to do with its...disappearance. I don't know her well enough to tell if she was lying.

The second occurance, today, is not so likely as I haven't even left the house or left my room, save to get food and take care of laundry. Plus the length of time in between it dis/reappearing is only about a couple of hours.

The latter just seems unlikely. Both times? I'm usually pretty observant. Usually.

The third option could be ghosts. That would be the most explainable. : /

Even though it involves a trivial item, it is a mystery nonetheless. And it's one that needs solving.

Editing begins on Mosquito Grove

2005-07-28T17:42:00.000-05:00

Finally! We got together last night and got about 90% or so of it edited. It's looking good and, with some minor tweaks here and there, it should be a nice little crazy video. I was unhappy with some of the decisions about certain shots that were not used, especially some really good looking ones that were crazy enough to go along with all of the other craziness, but on the whole, it's going well.

In real world news, I have begun working on a resume. My tolerance for my job is reaching a frightening level where I feel like I just don't care if I get fired or not. Sometimes I just show up for work - on time of course - and walk around, counting the minutes until I can leave. If I can busy myself, that's great. But I admit I just don't have the desire to work as well as I use to.

There's so much bullshit there, you need wings to stay above it. My supervisor got onto me because I didn't do something because this something takes a while to do but was brought to me late at night when it was almost time to go. Also, I had gone out of my way to prep for the next day, and despite that, she still got onto me as I predicted. She also was mad because of my 'excuse' as to why I didn't do it, yet she is the queen of excuses. In fact, when I brought up the fact that my performance review was THREE MONTHS late (a review that *may or may not* result in a raise), she gave me an excuse right back! Plus she always has excuses for why she's late to work nearly every day, why she didn't do this or that, why she is rarely on the floor and/or has mysteriously vanished for a lengthy amount of time, and so on. In fact, there's several running jokes in my department about what kind of excuse for being late she'll come up with next or how many times she'll have to disappear from the floor and what the excuse for doing so will be.

Oh, and get this, we have TWO meetings this weekend, one at 7am on Saturday and the other 8am on Sunday. Nice way to completely fuck up our weekends, you damn slave driving corporate bastards.

Now would be the perfect time to leave. Many of the old crew have moved on and there are even several absences from the department.

It'd be a nice bit of reckoning...

Banination

2005-07-26T01:09:00.000-05:00

I got banned from the Gamespot forums...again. I don't remember what the first time was for. This recent one was because I conducted a very aggressive flame campaign on the boards for 50 Cent's new videogame. Yes, you heard me. 50 Cent has a videogame. It's called 50 Cent : Bulletproof. And the normal posters in this forum are the most retarded people you will ever have the extreme displeasure of cringing from. I told one guy he doesn't speak English, and he replied that I was correct, that he speaks American. Another guy said I was "igorant".

It was funny because I had two messages on my Gamespot account from the 'admins' or something. One was a ban for 3 days and then I guess Gamespot read more of my stuff and so I got ANOTHER message saying I was banned for 5 days. I wonder if it's a concurrent or back to back sentence?

I just couldn't stop posting. All of the morons that were excited about some lame rip off of Grand Theft Auto where you play as 'fiddy' as he walks around and shoots people/gets shot (obviously embellished or not really based on his real life) were just sooo pitiful and practically begging for regulation. So I gave it to them. And gave and gave and gave. My post that outlined a few interesting facts about the very upstanding and noble rapper really caught some attention and contained a few notable things like how 50 Cent began selling crack cocaine when he was 12 or how even after his record deal, the last $5000 of his earning was spent on...yes, you guess it, more CRACK COCAINE.

And how interesting they chose to ban me (and delete my topics) just at the same time they are featuring an exclusive interview with the intellectual rapper about his new video game. I do believe this new game will be just as high quality as his many thoughtful and deep raps, especially the one where he 'raps' about robbing people. 50 demonstrates a very clear understanding of video games and their technology, and I was impressed with just how deeply he was involved in it's process. He was very articulate and had many intelligent things to say on the subject. By the way, those last three statements were complete falsehoods.

I'm also perma-banned from the Internet Movie Database, which was disappointing to me because of the many good topics I posted there. I had pages and pages of material and some of it was actually pretty well written and had a good purpose. So I simply registered under a different email address. But still, it isn't the same. My legacy - and will to fight - has been deleted.

Another pic from the set of the completed 'Mosquito Grove'.

2005-07-23T00:57:00.000-05:00

Hopefully we can get the video edited soon. Last weekend didn't work out. This weekend won't because the guy who has the footage is out of town. It's killing me because I can't wait to see all of the crazy stuff we shot come together.

I've been real busy lately. Working. Shooting (video, that is). Attending various hub-bub events. It's all been so hectic. I think I need some respite.

Oh well, activity is good for the soul.

Mosquite Grove Status : Shooting = done. Editing = not done.

2005-07-17T17:18:00.000-05:00

Guess I'm not in the best of moods. We got done shooting Mosquito Grove yesterday, but couldn't edit it because the guy whose house we were going to do this at was sick or something and didn't really communicate to us that well that he wasn't up to having us over for a bit to do this. I requested these last two weekends off just so that shooting and editing could be complete and although the former is, I still feel like we failed our objective.

It was pulling teeth to get these days off and even worse having to listen to them bitch about giving them to me. So I have no idea when we can edit this thing. Alot of people are out just in my department -- at least 3 and soon to be more -- so getting any more days off is next to impossible. And I will start to work more hours, and alot of mornings I am sure as well, to make up for the loss of people.

To top it off, looks like the washer here in broken so I don't know how the hell I am going to get my laundry done. I go back to work tomorrow, much to my chagrin, and I already started washing when I discovered it doesn't agitate AT ALL so my work shirts are wet and soapy.

Tomorrow is more of that 'work till close, then come back at 7 am the next day' bullshit. That's the last straw. I've already had it with this goddamn job as it is. I think it's time to start doing something proactive and bring it to their attention that that sort of thing is NOT TOLERABLE. Fuck what they think.

I really need something to up my disposition. And bad.

Mosquito Grove, (not) a nice place to visit...

2005-07-10T22:34:00.000-05:00

Busy past few days

2005-07-10T22:06:00.000-05:00

Friday, we got a few more shots for our 'Slobot around Spartanburg' spread (the second one actually; see the first one here). So far, the whole thing seems to be going over pretty well with the good folks at the hub-bub forums. They seem to genuinely dig it, and we even got our postings stickied!

Saturday, we started shooting for our new video for the Fosburr track 'Mosquito Grove'. It's about an old guy, the lone resident of the town called Mosquito Grove, who, upon walking in the woods, becomes the victim of a vicious robbery at the hands of a mysterious motorcyclist. Everything went very well. Although we didn't finish it, as predicted, we should be able to next weekend and will probably even begin editing it.

Nothing much happened today, which is fine by me since we all needed a rest.

Tomorrow, we take more photos involving Slobot, this time with some costumes to liven things up.

Bblarggggh

2005-07-07T21:40:00.000-05:00

I'm sick with something. Damndest thing I've ever seen. This morning started off wonderfully at 6:20 a.m. as I rolled out of bed and cursed my life in typical fashion. As I got to work at 7 a.m., tornado warnings for the areas mixed with the news of the London terrorist bombings made the day even more pleasant.

6 hours later, famished and a little woozy from lack of food, I finally went to break and ate a chicken strip combo from Wendy's. As I reluctantly finished it down, I began to be aware of this extreme wave of weakness that started to wash over me. I was just so bloody tired and sleepy all of sudden. My job entails ALOT of walking around, and I found that task to be excrutiating. Before long, another employee arrived and I let him take my place as I went to our little backroom where product awaited to be put out. That's when the nausea settled in. The resulting bathroom trip was not pleasant. No, not vomit. The other end.

I resumed my backroom duties and held on to my slipping sanity as the hours dragged by. I couldn't concentrate on doing anything but kneeling down on the floor and propping myself up against something. I felt at times very chilled and goosebumps poppep up on my arms. After I just could not take it anymore, I left 15 minutes before my shift ended.

I got home and instantly crashed, and that's when those horrible fever dreams started. What kind of biological torture is that?? Your mind replays these insignificant images and motions OVER AND OVER AND OVER, and you can never seem to escape them. After three hours, I got up and went to the bathroom for more fun.

Right now, I am still very weak. I haven't eaten anything nor do I have the desire to. My stomach alternates between nausea and the overwhelming desire to burp, which tastes like that cursed chicken strips every time it happens. I take naps often but am plagued by those terrible fever dreams; the last one about Fantastic Four reviews that play continuously over and over in my head. That was pretty much the last thing I was reading on the net about before my third nap of the day. I had plans to go out tonight, but that's so off it isn't funny.

Ugh...

Recognition

2005-07-05T22:48:00.000-05:00

Wow, we got on the front page of hub-bub.com today for our "Slobot Around Town" work. Still no profile on the front page yet, but I'm sure that will change. Slowly, the legend spreads... Haha. /Braveheart

I've also got some interest in the sig I created for the Gamespot forums about my Battlefield 2 statistics. 3 people messaged me about it. It's here if you want to see it. It just notes my rank as well as awards, badges, and ribbons acquired through my 'tour of duty'. So many war stories. Today, I was attacking an enemy held outpost and was confronted by a tank. The class I usually assume, Special Operations, gives me a scoped M4 as well as some C4(a type of plastic explosive that you can stick to anything and detonate from a distance). I used the C4 to successfully take out the tank and then a small, MG(machine gun) armed transport showed up and gave me yet more trouble. I took some cover and used it as I popped up to take a few shots at the gunner with my M4 which was difficult because the MG position is armored with only a slit for the gunner to aim through. I managed to take him out with a few well aimed shots and then took the point. It was quite an achievement. And it was quite a thrill.

Right now, I'm sipping down some wine which is a nice departure from the rather nasty and filling taste of beer. It's different and has a different 'effect' which is usually more productive in nature although tonight, through sheer lack of opportunity, has proven to be otherwise. All I've done is do this blog thing and try to watch the newest episode of Rescue Me, which hasn't gone well at all. The show is starting to bore me a little, which is disturbing because it started off so well. Maybe I need to give it a little more time.

I'm not quite 'on' tonight, so nothing really should be taken at face value. Trust no one.

4th of July

2005-07-04T20:49:00.000-05:00

I really love how my job screwed me over. Instead of being able to work on the 4th and get that nice holiday pay, I am off but have to go in early the next day at 7am. So there won't be any celebrating on my part AND it's probably going to be hard to get to sleep early with firecrackers going off the whole night. Fucking stupid goddamn job.

I'd really like to have a good 4th of July where I can drink alot and blow stuff up. Maybe next year, dammit. By then, I hope to have my own place and maybe my own yard to serve as a battlefield for the next year's Independence Day 'festivities'.

Ugh, I'm feeling a little low right now. My 6th year of working was a couple months ago and I was supposed to get a raise but my slack ass supervisor is too goddamn lazy and it's late.

I can call a number at work -- Human Resources or something -- where we supposedly can vent about things that aren't right at out job. I really would have alot to say.

Now I am sure you are wondering why if I hate it so much do I continue to work there. Well, first off, the pay is decent. And I really utilize the employee discounts we get. Hell, I have over 300 DVDs and many games and computer stuff. I've saved about $6000 compared to what I would have spent without my discount. Plus it's so damn hard to find a job and I HATE having to start over. Also, every day I am there is another day I thwart my nemesis's plans of getting rid of me. I think he gets angrier with each passing day. There is some comfort in that.

I'm out.

My laziness

2005-07-03T22:01:00.000-05:00

Jeez, it's been two weeks since I updated this bastard. Wow. I am one slack ass mofo. Actually, I've been way busy wasting away too much time playing the full version of Battlefield 2. I've spent 21 hours total playing within 13 days (since it's release). It's addictive. I may need counseling.

Our coalition with hub-bub.com is proceeding nicely. We've attended several events and have done several things for the project, mostly in the form of creative submissions. It feels good to be productive for something other than ourselves for a change and hopefully something grand will happen that will usher in a new era of coolness.

Our most recent endeavor for the organization involved taking some pictures from atop a tall building (or at least tall for where we live) of the quant but burgeoning city we live in. It worked out well. Unfortunately, one of us just happened to be like 2o minutes late despite ample reminders and discussions of the rendezvous time. It doesn't take rocket science to guess who the culprit was. Yet more evidence of the overwhelming ego of this jackass. It is beneath him to wait for others but he himself is not above making others wait. Wow, sounds familiar. I call him "His Royal Hindness", because he thinks so very highly of himself despite the fact that, as mentioned before, he is a jackass.

My job still sucks. Yeah.

I have not put forth the effort to find my own place. I don't know why. I think I sabotage my efforts subconsciously but just being too goddamn lazy to do anything. Battlefield 2 certainly doesn't help anything. Oh well.

I created a 'my space' thing. It's here if you're interested. Dunno why I did it. Boredom? I'm sure I will update it just as much as I update this. *smirk*

I will put forth more effort in keeping this thing updated.

The story so far

2005-06-19T17:08:00.000-05:00

In short, not much I'm afraid. It's been a drab week or so. I've seen Batman Begins, which was absolutely fan-fucking-tastic, and I hope to review it soon. I've been playing the demo to Battlefield 2 and it's a great demo which doesn't bode well for the future as I can see myself spending way to much playing this instead of actually doing something useful. I hope to write a little about this soon as well.

In other more important news, tomorrow I could be making the best announcement I have just about ever had the pleasure of making. It's nothing huge like marriage or a contract to do a film, but it's in resolution of something I tend to bitch about alot here. It looks like there is a good chance I could get my own place, and for a real cheap price. Not an apartment, but a duplex. I made the phone call, now I am just waiting for the return call. Hopefully that will come by tomorrow and I can post some really great news. Being able to get my own place has occupied my thoughts for awhile, and this new opportunity has commanded even more of my thoughts, too much really, to the point that I can barely hold any others in my head.

I'm always pessimisitic because that's just the way things go for me. I very rarely have good luck with anything, so I have to keep open-minded about the possibilty of this not working out. Several things could go wrong; the rent could be too high, the place could look like a complete wreck, and/or there may not be anything available. The person who told me about this place, their friend lives there and already said there should be at least one place available and that her place is pretty nice. So that's perhaps two down, one thing left to go. I did actually call on Saturday, got no answer, and so had to leave a message. That worries me that I have yet to hear back, but that's probably nothing more than a weekend thing. I did namedrop (the friend), which is usually a good thing.

Tomorrow we will see.

Odd night

2005-06-11T10:55:00.000-05:00

Last night was strange. We went to this one bar where we usually start our nights out at and it's always pretty dead, but this one night it was packed. It's a damn small bar as well so it really wasn't a very comfortable environment. There was also some drunk guy sitting beside us that felt the desire to proclaim to us that he 'was not a pervert' just because he (as well as we) were sitting near the ladies' room. So we went to this other bar that was usually packed and it turned out to be dead. So we left again and went to this other place that I kinda hate but it tends to have people there I know. Well, it sucked as well. The whole damn town was dead.

Finally, we went back to my friend's house to hang out in the driveway, depressingly enough. He had bought this stuff called salvia, which is LEGAL, and we both ingested it by the necessary method. Now I also had a few beers in me as well as a combination of Red Bull, chewable Pepto Bismal pills, energy tablets, and some vitamins. Now I don't know why I felt the need to state that, except for the fact that this salvia shit caused me to have one of the weirdest experiences ever.

Like I said, we 'ingested' it and all of sudden, everything became like a dream. The entire night was forgotten and I was standing there almost in a tunnel of rainbow colors. For some odd reason, I was trying to convince my friend that we couldn't run some cartoon on TV or something. Now considering that I do not have the power to make that kind of decision nor do I even have a career that involves cartoons, it was an odd thing for me to do. I seem to recall that my voice sounded very different, like it sounded similar to how when people who are in slow motion talk, very deep and incoherent. At that moment, I was some kind of television producer and I had made an executive decision. And my voice was in slow motion. Very, very odd.

Prior to going out, I got into a 'g-mail' war with the same guy who was once my friend. And yes, the same guy who is so prone to causing problems all the time, especially during our production of Slobot vs. The Minotaur. It's so pathetic because he will rant and rave about something stupid, and then say "oh, I was kidding or being sarcastic" and it's so obvious he's just bailing on his lame tirade because maybe he realizes how pointless it is. He always does that. We were discussing our future music video and he kept asking stupid questions, like "why is the guy out in the middle of the woods" or "why does he steal the other guy's money" and stupid shit like that. IT'S A GODDAMN VID! It's supposed to be weird! When I brought that up, he responded in what he believed was a funny, witty way and then declared that he was just kidding. I told him to continue to think up witty sarcastic things to say while we try to get this project finalized. Jeez, that guy.

All in all, a pretty craptastic night. I feel like shit now.

Swift rant attack!

2005-06-09T00:31:00.000-05:00

WARNING : THIS BLOG RANT MAY CONTAIN OFFENSIVE LANGUAGE. PARENTAL DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

HOLY SHIT! I got my work schedule today. They have me working until 11 pm on Saturday night, then I have to come in at 7 am on Sunday!! WTF ^#&@^!! &*^&#*^@!!! !&!!@&^ Something's gonna die or explode or get stabbed for this outrage.

And my work does this alot. Do they not care or are they too stupid to realize that we, as humans, do need at least 7 fucking hours of sleep as well as time for nourishment, some relaxation, and maybe hygiene attention?

Goddamn fucking fuckers.

61st Anniversary of the Allied landings on Normandy, France - June 6th, 1944 - D-Day

2005-06-06T00:44:00.000-05:00

This time 61 years ago, the largest amphibious invasion in history occured and was one of the major turning points in World War 2. Involving nearly 3 million troops, 12 allied nations, 6,000 naval vessels, 4000 landing craft, 12,000 aircraft and countless other pieces of equipment, weaponry, and vehicles, it was an extremely costly battle that opened a 'second front' and was the beginning of a new road that would finally end after less than a year with the defeat of German forces and the liberation of Europe.

Although 'D-Day' in military terms means the official start of any operation, it's become through popular awareness synonymous with a specific date instead of a vague date as it was originally intended. Military planners used the D designation so that they could plan up to as well as after the day of the operation which would not be known initially due to many factors such as enemy location and, as was the case with June 6th, the weather.

This is in tribute not just to the victors of this pivotal and important battle, but to anyone of any nation that participated in it.

IT'S FINALLY DONE!!! And some new friends?

2005-06-04T14:12:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, the music CD part of our CD/DVD set "Slobot vs. The Minotaur" finally arrived in the mail (the DVD came earlier) and signified the closing of the final chapter of this long and troubled production. It is in our hands. It is done. Finally. Last night, the first two copies were given away by the UFR Head Honcho; one to a bartender friend and the other to someone associated with a website that will, as about to be mentioned, probably have some significance for us in the future.

We have some 60 copies already reserved per our mailing list and the remaining 40 will be distributed to friends, families, and other people we may drunkenly stumble across. There may also be some lower quality versions to be strategically 'lost' in areas of interest or exposure possibility, such as bars, concerts, theatres, sidewalks, etc.

In other news, we have discovered a local website that deals with interests of arts, films, concerts and other concerns based in our rather small and quant city of Spartanburg, South Carolina. Hub-Bub.com is the name of the site, and discussions as well as actions pertaining to the betterment of the city is the name of their game. They are already in the midsts of transforming an old shoe store into a venue of arts and the other interests previously mentioned. The downtown area of Spartanburg is currently entering a gentrification stage, and right now we seem to be standing at the doorstep of something new and great with our fair city.

I have a good feeling about the site and it's people. I think it's something our website and crew (or what's left of it) can become involved with and maybe expand our scope greatly. This may be our chance to break out and join up with, as per our mission statement, other "like-minded individuals."

Today marked our first posts on their forums. Hopefully, we can ingratiate ourselves into their collective community and eventually come to a position of importance, distinction, and influence. I think it's mainly going to be the aforementioned UFR CEO and myself leading this drive as one guy from our crew has been in poor health lately (which I can understand easily...he stills does alot for us!)and the other continues to demonstrate absolutely no desire to do anything at all. But that's fine. We determine our own levels of input.

You can reach hub-bub.com by clicking on the picture above, the links throughout this entry, and the newly placed banner at the side of the page alongside the other links.

Random ramblings

2005-06-02T21:35:00.000-05:00

In follow up to my blog entry entitled, 'Another Nemesis', I found out yesterday that the very manager I confided to and I thought had my back actually went behind it and told this supervisor what I had said. I had to stoop to a bit of deception to clear my name as this supervisor confronted me, but considering the situation and the betrayal of confidence, I felt it necessary. Another manager mentioned in a blog from way back entitled 'Nemesis' also continues to slander, question, and doubt me. The old saying, when it rains, it pours... Well yesterday was quite the monsoon.

I also found out a former friend (and who will always remain former, especially now) continues to talk about me behind my back, which is not surprising in the least. Although he by far was the worst roommate possible, he actually says that I was the bad roommate. Projection? I wouldn't put it past him considering his overwhelming self-love would not allow any criticisms to find validity within him.

Next Tuesday is going to be a very expensive DVD day for me. First, there are the first and fifth seasons of Rescue Me and Sopranos coming out, respectively, as well as the long overdue special edition to Sling Blade. I haven't seen The Machinist yet, but it sounds like a great movie and worthy of a blind buy. Finally, The Karate Kid has certain sentimental value as well as being a pretty decent movie so I may get that. My wallet already hates me.

With partial thanks to Netflix, I have seen soooo many movies lately, some good, some bad. And I will continue to see many for the coming months. There are currently thirty-two movies on my queue. That, coupled with the many purchases, rentals, and viewings through other means, I have never seen so many great films in the short amount of time that I have. It's almost disorienting as I am not use to it, but it's great to finally launch a movie-viewing blitzkrieg.

I have decided, with some influence from 'outside' sources, that my plans pertaining to the house mentioned in this previous blog entry are not to be. With the volatile situation at work and the uncertainty of the future, my plans were, to say the least, idealistic and premature in retrospect. That in no way diminshes my furious resolve in the matter, but may only serve to fuel it.

Tomorrow is Friday, and I do not know my plans for the coming night. Although we have a meeting on Saturday morning at 7 a.m. (yes, A.M.!!) for work, I will not allow that to subdue the opportunity to get out and about. Plus I am off for the rest of Saturday. I have a 'lead' for the night, so I will see how that goes. I could just sit at home and let fate decide the course of my night by whether or not this person calls. Or I could 'lone wolf' it again which, as demonstrated by the last (and only) couple of times, can have questionable results. Saturday night should be a go for whatever no matter what.

It's been a rough week. I need some unwinding.

A new hope...

2005-05-30T20:05:00.000-05:00

Today I looked at a house a friend of mine is trying to rent out. Before, when he told me where it was located, I was a little nervous because the place in question isn't known for being a nice place at all to live. Surprisingly, the neighborhood was quite nice; very few houses and most of them occupied by families and not young, loud ass college kids. It was rather quiet with no one really around or anything as well.

The house itself is rather old but in good shape and my friend is continuing to fix it up. I like the hardwood floors in the bedrooms and living room. There's a garage and backyard shed (which is rather large like a barn) which are in questionable shape but I am assured this will be rememdied within a month or so. The front yard looks like the Sahara desert but that too should be fixed as soon as the grass grows I imagine. The laundry room is in my opinion too large and it's abundance of windows makes it better suited as some kind of sunroom or lounge or something. The basement quite frankly scares me senseless as it looks like a room from that old house in The Blair Witch Project. I hope no one was murdered there any time soon.

All in all, I was rather pleased. Some of the walls are painted yellow and there was one of the largest spiders I have ever seen in the bathtub, but these things can be fixed. Rent is cheap and the location, about three minutes from the local mall, is outstanding. I like the layout of the place and the fact that the bedrooms are seperated by a bathroom.

I have a good feeling about the place, and usually that first reaction weighs heavily on my decision concerning most anything. It could be an awesome place and coupled with the location and the cheap rent, it could definitely work out in my favor.

Another nemesis

2005-05-29T21:27:00.000-05:00

Looks like I have possibly become the departmental scapegoat where I work. I think my supervisor is using me as an anvil upon which to beat a hammer of accountability. Since I was once a supervisor myself, I have a unique perspective into what goes on at that level of management. Let me explain.

First off, I will have to convey just how slack my supervisor is. She is late almost every day and always has some excuse as to why. Seriously, I looked at her clock punches and EVERY DAY she was late for the past two weeks. Sometimes it's only a few minutes, others nearly half an hour or so. Even the part-timers are aware of this and like to laugh about how crazy her next excuse will be. I will list a few examples of your viewing pleasure:

-She has gotten ran off the road by a tractor trailer.
-She has missed her exit several times.
-Traffic has been at a standstill on the INTERSTATE(!!!)
-She had to help an old man find his house because he was wondering around and was senile and didn't know where he was.
-She's had a flat tire.
-Her truck wouldn't start at all and had to be towed to the dealership.

Now that's only the ones I can think of from the top of my head. Other employees under her have probably experienced similiar ones. She also has a tendency to get people to work for her all the time, like I mentioned in this blog entry. It's like she doesn't want to work, although I can sympathise on this one thing.

At work, supervisors are supposed to do these customer service evaluations on their employees. Basically, it's a little review for one particular instance when an employee is either helping a customer OR pretending to sell something to a supervisor whom is acting like a customer. I hated doing and having these things done on other employees and was one of the reasons I stepped down from my supervisor position. I've had too many bad experiences with these things and any fool who has a vendetta against you can make the results come out pretty much any way they want to. Well, seems my supervisor wants me to do them on other employees. I don't want to nor do I believe I should have to. And most of the time I don't do them. I just have a feeling it will be something else she can use against me. However, the fact that she FORGES these evaluations causes me a little conflict over how accountable I should be held for not doing them. She occasionally does a legitimate one on me, but most of the time she either makes one up without ever witnessing me actually sell to a customer or she hands me a blank one and tells me to fill it out. Now I don't mind since I hate them, but it is unethical and perhaps even forgery of corporate documents. Proving that, however, is next to impossible.

Now what set this whole thing off was basically triggered two Sundays ago. We use computers for a wide variety of job related things in order to cut down on paper. A list of tasks to be completed throughout the day, such as 'clean this' or 'organize that area' appears in the inbox of every employee daily. It is the job of the opening employee to accept a task or designate a task to another employee that works that day. As a store, we do very poorly on it so they are really beating the drums to get the 'scores' we get for efficiency up. Problem is that people are not completing these tasks and/or actually 'signing off' on their completion through the computer.

Now I come in later on in the day on Sunday and one of the first things I have to deal with is this accusation that I signed off improperly on a task that I did not complete. You see, there are several ways of signing off on tasks, the most commonly encouraged one is the actual 'completed' option where you actually complete your task. If you cannot, there are several choices, the one in question being a 'not completed on time and cannot be completed afterwards' option. To make things tougher, we had been told different things on how to sign off on tasks that were not completed. I assume if a task is not completed and signed off on appropriately, that's a 'red mark' that goes against the score of the whole damn thing. So some unsavory managers may encourage employees to complete uncompleted tasks anyway and just actually finish it physically later on.

What had happened, and it took me awhile to figure out, is that the previous night, another employee was showing me something I didn't really know about concerning the whole task system. A task that had not been assigned by the opening employee and therefore was just floating about was signed off on as being the whole 'not completed on time and cannot be completed...' deal but within my inbox because that's how the employee was showing me stuff. He was told to do this by a manager and as I noted, was in conflict with the way other managers handled things. I thought nothing of it.

So my supervisor was going to write me up for this. And on a day where she, who had opened, did NOT assign one particular task to anyone which was a big no-no! I explained what I thought had happened and she still continued to blame me, citing that I should not have left my inbox signed on for someone else to mess with. I was rather irrate to say the least that she didn't believe me or choose not to intentionally. There was an intercom page for me to meet her in one of the private rooms and I knew what was about to happen. I knocked on the locked door and as it was opened, there was my supervisor AND immediate manager, both hovering over a desk filled with that oh-so-familiar yellow paper. My manager explained to me why he had to write me up and I began my appeal to him directly. He understood and trusted me, and withheld on writing me up until he spoke to the other employee.

Suffice to say I never got an apology or anything for the incident after the employee completely supported my statement. Case closed. I however, was not satisfied.

I noticed that same day, as did another employee working with me, that my supervisor took an unusually long lunch. It was well over an hour which was bad on a weekend. I didn't know exactly how long so I entered her employee number into the time clock system and brought up her punches for the day. Nothing. She had not clocked out or in for lunch.

Now when this happens, usually the people in charge of payroll will assume the employee forgot to punch and will enter the default break time of 30 minutes. So the opportunity for deception is quite there...and she took it. I also know she went to lunch with another employee so I found his employee number, entered it into the clock system, and found out he had clocked out for an hour and ten minutes. Bingo. Don't know what I can do about this since it's probably akin to breaking into a suspect's house without a search warrant even though you find some drugs or stolen weapons.

As I mentioned before, on that day, my supervisor had neglected to assign a task to someone. Here she was going to document me for an infraction when she herself did not even use the system properly. I made sure to print the page that noted a task remained unassigned which featured the date and exact time of the printout. Exhibit A, my friends.

For Exhibit B, I printed out another page a few days ago that showed a task assigned to her not signed off by her at all AND a day late!

One day, I had to help out another department that was being absolutely swamped by customers. I ended up being in that department for nearly three hours. As a result, some things I was supposed to do in my own area were not done completely. I knew I would get hell no matter how legitimate my excuse was, so I pleaded to several managers and asked their support, which I got. Of course, the next day, my supervisor was fuming that some things weren't done. My managers had explained the situation to her, but that didn't stop her from still blaming me, albeit for something less severe. I did manage to get some of my stuff done, but she claimed the way I prioritized these tasks resulted in them not getting done, not the fact that I WASN'T IN THE DEPARTMENT FOR THREE FUCKING HOURS. A manager I am close to and share a similiar awareness of how much bullshit there is in the job, worked the next day and I was sure to fill him in on my reprimanding. He was fuming at that and told me I should consult our human resource department if it happens again. The fact that the department I helped out was the best performing one of that type IN THE COMPANY helped my case. I even managed to snag a small card of appreciation from that manager that features the date and details of my assistance. Exhibit C, anyone?

So it's hopefully obvious what has happened and what sinister role I am to play. She is masking her slackness by piling the blame onto my head so the allusion that she is doing something about the supposed slackness in others is maintained. It's a common diversion tactic. I have yet to perform my counterattack, but rest assured the next 'incident' that pops up with be dealt with in fine retaliatory fashion. I have several pieces of evidence and some alibis to back me up. The fact that our department performed better than 91% of other departments for this month should also weigh nicely in my favor.

We'll see.

Some T.V. shows

2005-05-28T23:38:00.000-05:00

I don't really watch much television. In late 2003, I got into the HBO series The Sopranos and found myself obsessed with the show. I bought up all three seasons on DVD as well as the fourth one when it came out afterwards. The fifth season comes out the 7th of next month and I will be picking it up. It was kind of a disappointing season but really picked up later, especially with one particular episode where a main character gets whacked. It's just a terrific show full of wonderful characters and always dynamic storylines. It also has a top notch cast, especially James Gandolfini, and the show clearly has a high level of production values. You just can't help but get caught up in the family and 'career' issues of Tony Soprano, one of the finest characters in the history of television.

I caught an episode of Rescue Me, the firefighter drama starring Denis Leary. It's actually pretty similiar to The Sopranos as the main character is very flawed but still extremely likeable. The cast, especially Leary, does an outstanding job and you can't help but to be interested in their characters. If I have any complaints, it's that it sometimes becomes too "The Denis Leary Show" and some of the storylines try a little too hard to be 'quirky', with the gay, black midget exemplifying that. Leary, usually the comedy man, is surprisingly quite good in a mostly dramatic role but when his character calls for humor, he nails it. I'm worried this show will get canned while crap like Joey or Will & Grace continue to crap the airwaves.

A few weeks ago, I was at Blockbuster and decided to rent the first few episodes of The Shield, which I had planned on doing for awhile since I heard such good things about the show. Suffice to say, as of now I have bought and watched all three seasons on DVD and have even started to watch it again. What a tremedous show! Michael Chiklis is outstanding as Det. Vic Mackey, a hardcore asskicker with a badge who is more than a little corrupt. He along with three other equally corrupt guys comprise the Strike Team, a small special unit that tends to operate on it's own rules but gets the job done. They are not at all above cracking some criminal heads or planting evidence to see that the bad guys get locked up and for good. The show is full of surprises and you can never tell what is going to happen. Everything has such a frantic pace, and the 'shaky-cam' style of camera work adds to the grittiness of their believeable world. I haven't been able to see much of the fourth season since I got into the show practically in the middle, but I can't wait to catch up and hopefully soon.

Watch these shows. They're really great and that's high praise since I don't usually watch television at all save for the History Channel or the occasional movie.

Internet problems

2005-05-24T11:35:00.000-05:00

My internet problems continue. To summarize, last Tuesday my internet decided to break. I called the Charter people that night and the guy blamed it on spyware despite the fact that I have not one, but TWO anti-spyware programs installed not to mention an anti-adware program, an anti-virus program, and a software firewall. He said to clear it out by downloading SpySweeper (uh, that's kinda hard to do hence the phone call!) and if the problems persisted, to call them back.

Of course, the next day, Wednesday, I call them back but this time, the guy does some smart investigation and comes up with the conclusion that my signal thing is low and that they would send someone out Monday (yesterday) between 1 and 5 which did NOT fill me with confidence. They also said they would put me on some list where if the Charter people were in the neighborhood or had someone cancel, they would come over to fix it. Suprisingly, someone did show up that same day to look at my problems. Unfortunately, he wanted to blame my router and as a result, did nothing to fix my problems. He said I needed to get a laptop and hook it directly up to the modem and bypass the router, which I did that night only to confirm my suspicions that that guy was full of shit. I called Charter back and the guy I talked to confirmed my confirmation that the other guy was full of shit and apologized and reassured me someone would be out on Monday or sooner since I was still on that so-called list.

I could still sometimes get on the internet, but if dial-up had been invented in the Old West, my connection would be slower than that. Gmail doesn't work because of the slow connection and surfing is an exercise in extreme frustration.

So yesterday, Monday, finally rolls around and I get home early from work to await the arrival of this next Charter guy. Of course, he never comes. It gets to be about 6:30 p.m. and I make my fourth phone call to Charter. I think I am on the line with them for an hour as the guy or girl (I couldn't tell) continually puts me on hold to, I guess, communicate with the dispatch center in order to assist me but to no avail. They are busy and/or have problems, the person tells me. The latter is definitely true.

So today, from 1 to 5, I should expect the Charter guy not to show up again I guess. This is beyond ridiculous. I wish I could reverse this situation like so:

Me: (picks up ringing phone) Hello?
Charter: Yes, there seems to be a problem with your bill. We never recieved it.
Me: Oh? Have you checked your mailbox for malicious mail-ingesting entities?
Charter: Uh, no. That probably isn't the problem.
Me: Sure it is. Get that checked out and call me back if my bill doesn't appear soon. (*Click*)

Me: (picks up ringing phone) Helloo?
Charter: Yes, we checked our mailbox for malicious mail-ingesting entities and, of course, found nothing. We'd like to know when you are sending us your payment.
Me: Oh yes! I am sorry, you are probably right. Don't worry! I'll send someone out there next week to deliver that bill, or sooner if they're in the neighborhood or something! Thanks! (*click*)

Me: (picks up ringing phone) Helllo?
Charter: Yes, you sent someone out here but he didn't actually bring payment for your bill! All he did was look around for awhile and then he said it wasn't his fault that we didn't receive payment. He told us we needed to test our mailbox out. Then he left.
Me: What? What a moron! I do apologize. Uh, what was the problem again?
Charter: Your bill. You never paid it.
Me: That is a problem, isn't it? Ok, I will send someone out there ASAP or sooner if they're in the neighborhood or something. (*click*)
Charter: Groan.

Me: (picks up ringing phone) Heello?
Charter: Yes, this is the fourth time calling regarding your bill. You said you would send someone out here to pay your bill. Someone never showed up.
Me: Uh, what? Huh?
Charter: You were supposed to pay your bill and you haven't? You said you would send someone out here today to pay it? You haven't?
Me: I'm going to need to put you on hold while I confirm this.
(*slight click, and then the song "Taking Care of Business" starts playing*)
Charter: %$^#!
Me: Ok, I'm back. Sorry for the wait. Hummm....
Charter: ...
Me: Ummm.
Charter: ...
Me: I'm just... Hummm.... So how's it going down there?
Charter: ... Slow. ...
Me: You...ha...shouldn't... (something incoherent)...oh yeah.
Charter: ...
Me: Uh, yeah, I'm trying to call the dude and he ain't answering or something. I think they're busy. Uh, lemme put you on hold again for a second if you don't mind
(*slight click, and then something that resembles 80's rock music starts playing*)
Charter: $#%%!! ^#%^*!
Me: Yes. Sorry about that. I think there's some kind of problem. We'll send someone out there tomorrow to take care of it, alright? Thank you! (*click*)
Charter: &%$@!

Star Wars Episode III - Revenge of the Sith

2005-05-18T20:48:00.000-05:00

I was lucky to see a sneak peek of Episode III last night thanks to the fact that I do actually maintain some inside contacts in this world. I would have wrote about it last night but it was nearly 4 in the morning (late screening), I was tired, and I was being plagued by horrific internet connection problems which are still happening at this moment. Damn Charter. They want to blame everything BUT the damn connection on their end.

Now to the movie. I'm not going to go into a whole review thing here as my limited internet connectivity will probably see that I am unable to post anything. Plus, as with the previous two prequels, I made the mistake of overcompensating their quality immediately after seeing them and from the shock of them not measuring up, gave overly enthusiastic grades. Plus I want to see it a few more times before I go all out. I will also try to avoid spoilers as much as possible because, although it is rather excrutiating due to all of the wonderful things I want to talk about, the less you know, the better.

All in all, I think the movie is amazing. No other entry in the prequel trilogy has gotten as many goose bumps and watery eyes out of me as this one has or, to be totally accurate, this is the only one that has caused the latter at all.

The opening battle is terrific. Heartpounding, exciting, well-crafted, and just plain fun. It really builds the relationship between Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker which I think is vital to the entire downfall of Skywalker and helps add more tragedy to the event. This space battle is so much more engrossing and in the spirit of Star Wars then the tepid one from The Phantom Menace. One particular moment, flourished with a triumphant Jedi musical theme, really got the chills up my spine.

The film, although still an obviously CGI created world, is filled with so much detail that really goes a long way to make it much more believable and realistic than the previous ones. Small things, like the always awesome clone troopers tending to their wounded or standing around chatting in between skirmishes, add a layer of humanity and tangibility that was sorely lacking in the other prequel entries.

The pace is a little too fast for me. As with the previous films, I think certain moments are totally unnecessary and should have been used for developmental purposes instead of serving the film's own self 'whiz-bang' purposes. It isn't nearly as severe in this one, but some things I could have done without. That's more of a personel preference issue I think, so it's hard to validate that as a critical point. It can be easy to get a little lost in what is happening or actually where everything is happening as after the initial space battle 'hook' and some exposition, everything takes a 'lightspeed' pace towards a very dramatic last act.

Don't get me wrong. I love the story. Most of it is great stuff and told very well. I wish this same attention and passion to detail and depth had been applied to the previous entries. There is so much going on that you feel almost drained from the sheer strength of what is happening. I really did feel those sparks of pure, childish excitement well within me. Certain things made me want to spaz out like an overcaffeinated child about to O.D. on some Jolt Cola. I really see this as the final, rewarding maturation to Lucas's skills as a storyteller that were previously lost in the period of time between the original and prequels trilogies. It's a little late in that fashion, but with the work he has turned in with this one, I am compelled to forgive him.

Everything from the action to the dialogue to the acting is more than improved. Yes, I said the acting. It's almost fact that the performance quality in the previous films was generiously on the bad side which I account more to the directorial priorities of Lucas than the skill of the actors themselves. In this one, I see broader stretches and more attention to emotion. I see actors/actresses that are able to finally..act. It's still nowhere near perfect, but the acting is such an improvement that you are hard-pressed to even consider it when you think back on this film, even in terms of negative points. Hayden Christenson actually did a pretty good job in this one. And this is not even in comparison to the other films. Ewan McGregor is a terrific actor and I find him to be much closer to his capability in this one. In fact, I would venture to say that he really carries this film and his skill and presence as an actor help to really up the emotional level of the often dark events that happen in this film. It's difficult to explain, but it would be hard to think this highly of the film without him involved.

While the cheesiness of the dialogue is still present, it's fewer and farther between. I found myself flinching far less than previous ones and actually feeling relieved at certain moments that would normally be lost to near camp levels. The comedy is still off but there are less severe examples of this in the film. No farting animals or bratty children running about. Not even Jar-Jar ruins this as he is in the film for less than 10 seconds and - brace yourself - says...NOTHING! Just in case the sheer shock of this revelation has rendered you completely daft, I will repeat: JAR JAR SAYS NOTHING! Not one word, not one funny, not one damn thing! THANK YOU CHRIST AND GEORGE LUCAS! In it's place, however, is a little too much 'droid' humor. It's bad, but tolerable due to it's limited quantity.

This film is dark. I was very much impressed with what Lucas went with here and how he went about it. Some things I didn't quite expect to see in a Star Wars film. While not even close to the quality of the universally accepted best entry in the entire epic Empire Strikes Back, it IS much darker. In fact, I would say that certain things are actually disturbing and in that intentional, masterful way.

To conclude, I greatly enjoyed it. Certain things, as with the previous entries, could have been handled differently but the way other things were dealt with, at least in this one, more than made up for it. There is a dramatic increase in quality across the board and Lucas has really stepped up and delivered with this one. I am nearly convinced my previous naysaying was unwarranted. I will, at least, suspend all naysayery for the time being to instead discuss how much I loved - yes, LOVED this one.

Thanks George. And good job. Really.

Follow up to other night

2005-05-16T00:34:00.000-05:00

Well, that night that was mentioned in my last entry was pretty much a dud. So much in fact that I didn't feel the need to provide a prompt follow-up. Sorry for the inconvenience. Not my fault it was a dud mind you. God knows I tried to make it the other way around.

Oh well...

What will happen?

2005-05-12T20:57:00.000-05:00

It's going to be interesting to see where I will be two or three hours from now. I don't go in till later tomorrow and am feeling a bit...adventurous tonight. I'm gonna do something I have planned on doing for a long while. It's nothing big at all, just a little thing I've needed to do. I've been rather bold (at least for me) lately with decidely mixed results. So we will see what happens.

I've written about the 'issue' tonight concerns several times. Most- actually ALL of have been decidely of negative results.

Let's hope tonight I will have something good to say in my blog. Wish me luck...

Thinking of starting a new blog

2005-05-12T20:05:00.000-05:00

I got to thinking that I should start a new blog devoted entirely to the fine art of bitching about my job. Since I am already quite verbally practiced at this, translating to text shouldn't be an issue at all. I read some other blog where some waiter was bitching about his, so why can't I try my hand at revealing to the clueless world the true horrors of retail electronic sales?

Of course, since I am fulltime, I won't have all the time in the world to write about the hundreds of stupid, rude, and completely useless people I encounter on a daily basis and the mental anguish their aforementioned stupidity, rudeness, and uselessness cause on my sensitive mental stability which would require bajillabytes to accurately document. And these are only the employees I am talking about! Sharing the experience of customers would require more internets than the amount Bush could invent in his head!

For your pleasure, I will now include what may be considered to be an example of this new type of blog. Viewer discretion could (and maybe should) be advised!

My favorite kind of customers are the ones that don't have a fucking clue what the hell they are looking for. They come in and automatically assume you have enough pyschic abilities to read their tiny, challenged minds and unlock the secrets of their every want and desire in a second flat.

Say they hear this one song on the radio, and three years later they decide they MUST have this song! So they pop in the store and go straight to the first music section employee they see, knowing full well, and expecting nothing less, that this employee will be able to tell him/her the one artist out of kabillions that sings this one piece of shit pop bullcrap. They don't know the fucking artist name, the fucking album name, and not even the name of the damn song. All they know - and they tell you this like it's the answer to life- is that it has the words "yeah, yeah" in it somewhere. Or maybe. Maybe it's only one "yeah" or three. They know it goes 'dhh dhh dhhhh dhh dhh dhhhh' as they try and stutter some half ass attempt at recreating the beat with their scratchy and quite frankly off-key voice.

More amazing is the reaction your mixture of confusion, anger, and sudden sadness causes to them.

"What??! You don't know what I am talking about??!", they hiss. "You're supposed to be a music expert. You're supposed to know every song, artist, album, one-hit wonder, compilation, best-of, worst-of, box set, limited version, cover, and single EVER! You should know every single lyric and every single word of that lyric in your sleep! When you are not working (or thinking of suicide), you should be memorizing songs and writing biographies on musicians! You should be infiltrating radio stations and stealing playlists every night when you aren't drinking yourself out of depression so that if I come in and ask you the name of this song this station played last week at 3:23 am, you should laugh at what is surely a feeble task and spout out not only what song and artist it was, but the exact barometric pressure at the time the song played! You simpleton! I want a manager!!!"

Well, that's a snippet.

Even worse is the customer that doesn't know what they have.

I know computers are complicated devices. I know they are a challenge, especially to older folks that just got use to figuring out the intricacies of modern indoor plumbing or vehicles that don't require the use of horses as a means of propulsion. However, if you do not know what kind of computer you own, please do not expect us to know. People think that us determining what kind of computer they have should be as easy as determining if someone is alive or dead, which actually is more of a challenge than you think given the type of people we deal with. Computers are NOT cars where there is a model and/or make per year. "I've got a 99 Hewlett Packard...I think. Will this thing hook up to it?"

Anyway, I already feel my blood pressure rising and my sanity falling so I'm gonna cut this sneak peek off right there and let the anticipation for the conclusion which may or may not come keep you from attaining slumber at night.

Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I hated living it.

86.2° F

2005-05-11T20:54:00.000-05:00

That's the current temperature of my room at this time. Now couple that with the very small size of the room and you get a nice bit of constriction going on.

Yeah, it's pretty bad. Not like outside where you can come inside to escape the heat. Alot of times, it's actually cooler outside. It got up to about 88° in here earlier.

The problem is that my computer and TV run constantly, if not at the same time. Both, expecially the computer, put out a good deal of heat. I have a fan, but all that does is circulate hot, dry, almost stale air. Opening a window is useless because of lack of a draft unless another window in the house and my door are open, but I don't like to have my privacy 'exposed' like that.

I know I am harping on this and alot as of recent, but it's getting a little on the unbearable side to where I feel my capability for rational thought slowing fleeing. So to recap, I am paying waaay too much for a maybe 12'x12' room in a house that is not kept cool despite an A/C unit and that is always noisy from doors being slammed inexplicably all the time. Plus this recent 'lock out' has me worrying. What the hell is happening here??

I've tried to tolerate this, but it's starting to get to me to were I just feel...angry.

Strange occurences

2005-05-10T01:05:00.000-05:00

I was just outside tonight enjoying a smoke(a litte after 1 a.m.) when I began thinking about my whole situation here. I compared it to eating something to tide me over before a meal, like a snack. Only that meal has yet to come. So I have to keep eating this spinach or cauliflower or something equally distasteful and unfulfilling until the time comes to where I can finally enjoy that full course feast.

As I ruminated about this, I suddenly caught sight of the brightest shooting star I have ever seen, falling right down in my field of view. It seemed to last hours as it slowly fell before fading away and down into wherever. It was so bright I couldn't even describe the color, only that it was of pure, nearly blinding light.

Of course, the most common association with falling stars is the ritualistic 'wishing' upon it. Odd that as I was thinking of a terrific lead-in to a wish when lo and behold should the very thing that ushers them in befall me. Right there. In front of me.

It doesn't take much to assume that I would at that point, totally chilled to the bone at that very sight, wish for the most appropriate thing at the moment.

I wished for that meal to come soon.

Slobot vs. the Minotaur : current progress

2005-05-10T00:36:00.000-05:00

I figure some of you out there may be wondering what is happening as the last page of this final chapter SLOWLY begins to finally turn. Well, all we are doing now is waiting for the DVDs to be replicated (or duplicated, cuz I can't ever remember the proper damn terminology). That's all we can do. Should be done and in our eager and sweaty hands soon.

I think we got rejected from some film festival. Dunno what festival as we didn't even enter it ourselves. I think a fellow colleague did that for us. But supposedly this festival is very demanding, so I don't really feel the need to cry over it.

The people that have seen it say it's really good. Personally, I think it's shot very well and considering our budget and time, looks great. It's a bit slow, but that's not really a bad thing. Some things didn't work out the way I wanted. But other things exceeded it, so it all kinda balances out. One thing I can say is that I had a HELL OF A TIME doing it, despite the many difficulties we experienced.

The only person that had any negative comments was one who was involved with it. And he is this same difficult prat that caused about 99.998% of the problems we experienced during the whole bloody thing. So I automatically dismiss anything he has to say on the matter. He didn't exactly do a fucking thing to help us change much during shooting or even preproduction so it's rather hard to take anything he says seriously.

We are currently working on a vid to the FOSBURR track mosquito grove. Hopefully it will involve some nameless tosser mucking a bit around on a motorcycle and alot of insanity and weirdness.

WTF

2005-05-07T01:55:00.001-05:00

Ok, it's late. I go home and the goddamn screen door is LOCKED. WTF flag is raised. I get on the cell phone and call the girl who lives with the guy that basically owns the joint. "Hey, the screen door is locked. I can't get in". Ok, some shuffling and static and an abrupt hang up. I wait around for 5 fucking minutes. Nothing. I call again. No answer. So I have to basically break in. I get past the screen door and the main door has both the deadlock and the knob lock locked completely, which is unusual. Luckily my key still works. I get in. Nobody there.

What the hell is going on?? No complaints from them or anything as far as my stay there. Not a word, not a goddamn word. I don't knock on their bedroom door. I go straight to my room. But I am wondering what the FUCK is up with this SHIT!!?!I even asked much earlier before if there is anything I am not doing right.

I can understand maybe the screen door being accidently locked, but both locks on the main door?? No.

Something is amiss.

Very slight site changes

2005-05-01T02:08:00.000-05:00

As all 3 of you probably have guessed by now, I have changed some stuff around that probably won't matter. Anyway, I got brave and decided to muck around with some settings, and luckily managed not to delete the whole internet in the process.

I adjusted the title color and increased content width so that more words appear horizontally so you guys don't have to exert so much vital energy by scrolling down alot. No need for thanks or financial compensation...this time.

Latest Uterine Fury Records project already complete!

2005-04-30T23:06:00.000-05:00

Mrplaid, our newest member, has already distinguished himself with the completion of his Flash video to Kat Kronic. Hopefully, mrplaid will continue his tremendous contributions to our organization.

Without further adieu, here is his terrific flash video to Kat Kronic!!

C L I C K H E R E

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy review (spoilers)

2005-04-30T19:50:00.000-05:00

Well, not totally a thumbs down, but close.

Let me preface this review with a story on how I came to know Douglas Adams and the greatness of the wonderful mix of comedy and science fiction that was his work. It all goes back to when our family got it's first computer. This was well over 15 years ago and there was this very perplexing, completely graphics-less text game called The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy on it. I was probably about 10 or so, and this game was super challenging because firstly, I was not at all use to playing a text game where you had to type out exactly what you wanted to do and secondly, I didn't even know there was a book much less was I familiar with it's story which was pretty vital to getting around in the game I thought. I managed to get aboard the Vogon ship which looking back now was rather impressive.

Flash forward a couple of years I suppose, give or take a little. I'm in middle school at a book fair when I spot a book bearing the same title of that damned frustrating game I have! Of course I buy it and eventually buy the second and fourth novel in the series. Why I didn't buy the third one eludes me, but I imagine it just wasn't there to buy. My very smart friend buys the book as well and we read it at the same time. I mentioned the game to him and strangely enough, when we discussed where we were in the novel, we used first-person, like "now the Vogons are reading poetry to me". Why we did that also eludes me and I cannot really even speculate on why we did it.

Flash forward to nearly a year or so ago. I hear that they are making a film version of the story. With today's technologies, this film could be great I thought, as excitement began bubbling up inside me.

Flash forward a little more to this review.

I just recently read the books again, listened a little to the radio play, and saw the 1981 BBC TV series version so the whole magical world of Hitchhiker's is still fresh in my mind. With that being said, it must also be said that the movie utterly fails to capture this world. The world it creates instead is almost entirely, but not completely, unlike the world I know and love from the past incarnations.

The biggest complaint for me was how much it strayed from the books. I am fully aware of the fact that the brilliant Douglas Adams intentionally changed plot points, events, characters and other things with each new subsequent version, but not changes nearly as drastic as the ones present in this film. It starts off pretty loyal while omitting some minor stuff, but as the plot gets going, things start to diverge rather dismally.

The biggest change is the overblown romance between Arthur Dent and Trillian. Did they decide that the material in the books was not strong enough so they had to throw in a hackneyed and cliched love story? Yes, later on in the books, there is that type of story, but here it is way too rushed and generic in comparison. I cringed at the new addition. Here are just some of the other changes I can recall: (note this is completely from memory so I may slip up with a detail or bit of chronology)

- Arthur awakes and checks his NOKIA CELL PHONE to see if a particular character has called him which she hasn't because of something that is revealed later on.
- The dialogue between Mr. Prosser and Arthur going into detail about just how hidden the plans that called for the demolition of his house are has been tragically reduced. A part of the gag is there, but on it's lonesome totally ineffective and worthless.
- Instead of Mr. Prosser lying in front of the bulldozer in Arthur's stead, Ford Prefect shows up with beer (!!!) to bribe the construction workers not to knock his house down. That whole dialogue of getting Prosser to take Arthur's place in the book is terrific and a terrible loss.
- The great line about Ford asking if Arthur is busy while he lies in front of the bulldozer has been omitted.
- Ford takes Arthur to the pub for some pints despite the fact that Ford, as mentioned, already had beer.
- The Vogon Prostetnic Jeltz's announcement has been shortened. In the books, there is almost a back and forth dialogue between him and someone on Earth about them not having seen the plans for Earth's demolition located in some other galaxy. The funny parallel between this event and the whole thing with Arthur's house and those plans has been all but eliminated.
- The Guide's entry (and newly revised entry) on Earth has been eliminated. Shame really, because that was one of my favorite things in the book. Not a "harmless" loss by any means.
- While on the Vogon Constructor ship, the dialogue between Ford, Arthur, and the guard about trying to persuade the guard to consider a career change has been omitted, also tragically.
- The part about someone tampering with Zaphod's brain is omitted.
- During the missile attack on the ship, the whole little tidbit about someone injuring their elbow and the dramatic effect of keeping the 'victim' secret until later on is gone.
- In the film but definitely not in the books, Trillian gets captured and taken to the Vogon homeworld after the group stops off at the planet home to Humma Kavula, a character created just for this film. Turns out Humma was a running mate of Zaphod who then proceeds to take Zaphod's second head to hold for ransom until they can recover a POV gun. This new addition is not only uninteresting, it's worthless as the plot point is never resolved! Zaphod never gets his second head back and Humma never gets his gun! While the Vogon homeworld (the group goes there to rescue Trillian) is interesting and neatly expounds the whole bureacracy aspect of their race, it was time that could have been used to more accurately translate the book.
- In the books, there is no portal to whisk them away to somewhere on Magrathea. Arthur and Marvin stay behind to guard the ship and later meet up with Slartibartfast while Ford, Zaphod, and Trillian venture on to eventually meet up with the mice.
- Vroomfondel and Magikthise are not in this book. That is a shame as well, as the whole bit about "demanding" this and that was very funny.
- Arthur and Slartibartfast do not ride through Magrathea in some weird cherry-picker thing in the books. It's supposed to be a small "bubble" ship. I don't really have much to complain about here because it's a minor thing.
- The trigger happy cops that were so humorous in the books are completely gone because the scene where the group runs from the mice is completely altered.
- In the film, Arthur comes up with what will be used as the ultimate "Question" to the "Answer of Life".
- The ending is completely different as the group all meets back up on the Earth Mark 2 where the Vogons show up and start shooting. Marvin gets killed, comes back to life, and saves the day when he shoots ALL of the Vogons with the POV gun. In the later books, only Arthur and Ford go to Earth Mark 2 after the spaceship they're on crashes onto it and the only people on it at that time are a form of early man, the survivors of the ship, and Arthur and Ford.

While Arthur, Ford, Trillian and Marvin are all pretty accurate to their previous incarnations and well acted by the cast, the vital role of Zaphod has been gravely mucked with. With the loss of his second head and therefore one half of his brain which by the way never happens in the books, he has been reduced to a drunken idiot that must be pretty much guided by hand throughout the film. While I really like Sam Rockwell and thought he would be perfect in the role, sadly, a combination of bad writing and overacting ruin the character. He was much closer to the character in Confessions of a Dangerous Mind than this one. All of his charm, wit, and bravado are gone, replaced by a dancing, rambling buffoon prone to pratfalls and other comic idiocies. The newly created Humma Kavula (supposedly created by Adams just for John Malkovich) is a terribly uninteresting character and is a dreadful substitution for the many, more dynamic (and entertaining!) characters left out of this film version.

Now the film isn't totally terrible. In fact, I don't hate it. Some things they nail, such as the beginning of the film while still on Earth prior to it's destruction. I also like the nods to the BBC series with the magnificent Journey of the Sorcerer theme by The Eagles at the reveal of the Guide, which frankly gave me chills, and the old version of Marvin (from the BBC series) present in the DMV-like area on the Vogon homeworld. The rest of the music is a bit overdone, especially during the scene on the planet where anyone who comes up with an idea gets slapped in the face by some mysterious flyswatter beast that resides in the ground. The film's strongpoint, with a few exceptions, is that it looks magnificent and is wonderfully shot. I liked the design of the giant supercomputer Deep Thought. The 'showroom floor' on Magrathea is magnificent and almost breathtaking. The Vogon homeworld looks like it should and is one of the very few things I liked about the new material. On the other hand, I did not like the design of the Heart of Gold which was described in the books as look like a very sleek shoe. In this, it's a giant ball. While Marvin looks pretty neat, he moves like a small guy in a very plastic costume. Oh wait...

Most of the "jokes" in the new material are not funny. The whole thread about Humma Kavula and his 'cult' is a good example of that. Some of the jokes in the old material are not really that funny because of the way they're 'told'. Like the part about Zaphod's brain specialist (played by Jason Schwartzman) saying, "Zaphod's just zis guy, you know?" is included, but it's been relegated to almost the background where it drastically loses it's effect. Other jokes are only half told which either diminish their effect or completely kill it. On the otherhand, some jokes, old or new, DID work. I did really like the scene where the group, after the Infinite Probability Drive does it's usual thing, becomes yarn puppets. And the whale scene, one of the most famous scenes in the books, was done with great care, attention, and affection for the material. The graphics for the actual Guide were very well done and humorous as well.

I think the movie is spot on when it sticks to the books. When it strays, it mostly becomes a muddled unfunny mess. Why they came up with these new ideas instead of using the time it occupies to better adapt the book and portray more of the events in it is something that eludes common sense and decency. The ending is also completely unsatisfying because it is not only vastly different, it doesn't look like it can decide whether to wrap the movie up completely or leave room for a sequel. I think that's the idea. They mention the titular location from the second book, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, but I don't see any purpose of what it would serve seeing as to how things seem to already be wrapped up by how far they skipped ahead in regards to the ending.

For a movie, it isn't bad. For a movie about The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, it's pretty bad.

I have succumbed to the dark side of hype about Star Wars Episode III (some spoilers)

2005-04-29T00:09:00.000-05:00

Yes, I have fallen to the dark side.

It didn't suddenly happen. Well, not all of sudden that is. It slowly started to build as of recent. With all of the tiny disjointed plot details coming in, I found myself being swayed. First the soundtrack became available which as time went by and I listened to it more, reached deep down and grabbed that long forgotten and forsaken excitement only Star Wars can create. It is a truly wonderful soundtrack that really hits the dark tones and conveys to underscore a truly sinister series of events. It isn't as dynamic as the soundtracks to the other episodes; instead, it remains to merely accompany the visuals instead of generating it's own emotion. Not to say it totally relegates itself to this notion, but it does so more than usual.

And the trailers only added to the demise of my skepticism. Hayden really looks like what Anakin should at that point in his progression. In Episode II, he was a whiny brat that at no point ever convinced me he would eventually become one of the most recognizable and convincing villains in the history of cinema. I blame both Lucas's writing and direction as well as the rather bland acting of Hayden. But in this one, as far as I can see, effort went into overtime in nailing just how fargone he has become in his pursuit of total power at whatever cost. Plus, the look! That long hair really makes him look...different. Grown up? I don't know. Dare I say that he looks like a villain?

And then there was the recent review by Kevin Smith. I only read bits and pieces with minor spoilers, but the idea of Ben leaving "Skywalker burning alive on the shores of a lava river, with Anakin spitting venomous sentiments at his departing mentor" after cutting his arms and legs off...well, that just sounds gruesome, twisted, and totally on track for just how dark this film is. It just may make Empire Strikes Back come off as a Disneyworld ride with singing animals and sickeningly upbeat musical numbers.

I will be there opening day the same as I was with the releases of the Special Editions in '97 and for Episodes 1 and 2 in '99 and 2002, respectively. I already have my days off for it in fact.

Maybe I am setting myself up yet again for disappointment. No one expected it for the Phantom Menace, and the early good word of mouth for Attack of the Clones proved only to make us all a victim a second time. And now this. The same thing could be happening...for a third time no less!

Still, something tells me Lucas finally got it right. Everything just looks and sounds so good so far. It just feels right. A part of me can hope.

After all, this is Star Wars.

Three sure things in life

2005-04-26T22:11:00.000-05:00

Contrary to popular thought, there are actually THREE sure things in life, not just two. The first one is still taxes and the second one still death, although the order is debatable. The third one is this:

"When being sarcastic, no matter how obvious you make it, there will always be people - especially on the internet- that will believe you or think you to be serious."

One of my most anticipated films for this year, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, opens this Friday. It has some stiff competition from the hotly-awaited sequel to one of the finest pieces of cinema ever to seemingly fall from the heavens and grace us with it's holy light of pure quality. Of course I refer to the sequel to XXX, inspiredly called XXX 2. Although this time Vin Diesel-less, the fact that master thespian and songwriter Ice Cube is in it should in no way diminish it's possibilty to attain greatness at the box office, with critics, and at Oscar time.

Anyway, I have posted my plans for an XXX 2 celebration on the IMDb and have laid down the outlines on how we are to conduct this occasion for rejoice. Of course people know that I jest, but some cannot understand that my jesting extends not just to the idea of a party, but to the very idea that I would in any way support this piece of celluloid abortion.

Here are my posts as well as a few choice replies that had me scratching my head in a mixture of utter bemusement and contempt for humanity. Enjoy!

My post: Who's coming to my XXX 2 State of the Union party??
by - darklight-1138 2 hours ago Tue Apr 26 2005 17:31:34
Edit Reply

I will be having it soon in celebration of the coming of the greatest film experience since Burt Reynolds lit up the screen in the Oscar-winning "Cannonball Run II."

We will have plenty of beers and there will be a dance-off to see who can bust the best moves to the new XXX 2 soundtrack that has hit stores today (go buy it to support this wonderful franchise NOW)! Please bring your own babes/beer/nachos as we do not want to get in trouble with local officials or break any regulations or patriot acts.

Please bring plenty of baseball bats or other assorted blunt instruments, as we will be getting very drunk and riding out to local theaters to make sure no nerds are in line to see Hitchhiker's. If they are, we will have a "conversation" with them in order to show them the errs of their ways and make them buy several tickets for XXX 2.

Please come out for some fun and in order to show our support for a wonderful film and all involved in it's epic making!

And now, here are some replies:

by - dave3290 2 hours ago Tue Apr 26 2005 17:36:26
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You guys knew Id be posting on here. Dude im in! I love XXX. I cant wait for the new movie. S_hit these hitchhiker freaks dont even deserve to go see XXX 2.

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by - bullsfan42 2 hours ago Tue Apr 26 2005 17:54:18
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You guys are fricken losers is this the best thing you had to do all day?

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by - jdt555 2 hours ago Tue Apr 26 2005 18:01:47
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Dark, I love your enthusism, but that won't change the fact that XXX is a horrible movie. XXX2 might make more then H2G2 on the opening week, but 3 years from now, no one will have it on their DVD shelves at home. They will be in the 2 for 10 dollars pile at best buy. And you don't have enough fans to even fake a good rating on IMDB. Look at its listing. It is STILL awaiting 5 votes. I know more then 5 people have already seen it in screenings. Maybe they are too ashamed.

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by - Boogaman 28 minutes ago Tue Apr 26 2005 19:53:58
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Remember when this guy was posting in the other thread about how rappers shouldn't act? And he specifically mentioned Ice Cube? Surprising he's joined the XXX2 fan ranks.

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Haha. Morons. You can view the entire conversation HERE.

Star Wars Episode III - Revenge of the Sith soundtrack review (spoilers)

2005-04-10T16:39:00.000-05:00

The track titles are obviously the spoilers, so read with caution!

I’ll comment on each track:

1 (Main Title and Revenge of the Sith) – Same great opening Star Wars theme that, as typical, immediately is followed by a new theme. It sounds like the movie will start off with a lot of action. A very strong Jedi theme takes over very quickly into it and then it goes back into new material for awhile. Lots of heavy percussions. This track is almost 8 minutes, and ALL of it is very quick and frantic.

2 (Anakin's Dream) – This track is the exact opposite of the first one. Very slow and deliberate version of the love theme from Attack of the Clones (Across the Stars). The very beginning actually reminds me of Schindler’s List because of the lone string instrument, a rarity with a Williams Star Wars score. The track then takes a very dark turn and hits an intense crescendo that implies some very dark imagery. The rest is rather subdued exposition accompaniment with bits of musical flair rising occasionally to probably emphasize some dynamic piece of dialogue. All in all, a rather dark and lonely theme.

3 (Battle of the Heroes) – This track starts off restrained, with a subtle action theme just begging to kick loose which does to the aid of a strong chorus. We hear more Jedi themes interspersed amidst some rather chaotic music. The ending is a terrific rise of heavy percussion that Williams excels at.

4 (Anakin's Betrayal) – A real somber and desolate start with music that really reminds me of the more desperate music from one of the battle scenes from The Thin Red Line. Lots of chorus that reinforce the very dismal mood of the track, which ends as depressingly as it begins.

5 (General Grievous) – We get a bad guy theme which a chaotic flood of wind and percussion that kind of, and unfortunately, reminded me a bit of the Batman Begins style of music. But it was very slight. More quickly paced music to probably underscore just how bad this bad guy truly is.

6 (Palpatine's Teachings) – Some very creepy very deep sounding chorus starts off this ominous track. We finally hear some variations of the Imperial theme with a quick Jedi theme follow up probably indicating a conflict. More dark moody music to accompany what is probably some very dark and darkly purposed dialogue. Suddenly, a very optimistic theme that goes back to the Phantom Menace (I believe it’s a Naboo theme or some variation) pops up and ends the track.

7 (Grievous and the Droids) – More frantic music indicating action or a build to action starts this track, which then goes into exposition mode not too long after. It then again explodes into action mode typical to Williams’ work for the prequel, which is more wild craziness than his more organized and theme-heavy brilliance for the original trilogy.

8 (Padme's Ruminations) – We get some Middle Eastern style female chorus for the opening to this track which segues into more dark themes that are the entirety of this track.

9 (Anakin vs. Obi-Wan) – This track begins very quickly with a good solid new theme peppered with some good variations of the Imperial March. This track will be one of the most important ones in the film, and it is top quality stuff. Most impressively, Williams expertly uses music from the Luke vs. Vader battle in Empire Strikes Back throughout this wonderful track. If you remember the music from when Luke is swinging his lightsaber desperately at objects Vader is “force-moving” and striking Luke with, you’ll already know this track, but this time, Williams “pumps up” the Imperial themes already prevalent. The Jedi theme pops up briefly before the track jarringly ends.

10 (Anakin's Dark Deeds) – More ominously building music that explodes briefly into chorus, soon followed by more purposeful music. A very eclectic track that is sometimes slow but mostly fast, with bits of chaos that are spaced by moments of quiet build or resolution. We get pieces of a very desperate theme forming, emphasized by a very strong hit of brass and percussion. It looks almost like a montage sequence.

11 (Enter Lord Vader) – A sinister flair of music starts off this track which then dips into a more quiet, reflective tone. The track returns to its more sinister nature, with a strong build throughout peppered with more quiet areas. Towards the end of the track, we get an Imperial theme after a build which is unfortunately brief, followed by a just as brief Jedi theme that fades out with bits of the Emperor’s Theme.

12 (The Immolation Scene) – This track starts off very desperately and reminds me of the adagio more popularly known from the film Platoon. The track soars very bitterly, and it cannot mean anything other than something very tragic is happening.

13 (Grievous Speaks to Lord Sidious) – The track begins in typical Williams full orchestra fashion. The music is quickly paced and dips into a frantic chorus before slowing dramatically into a low orchestra piece routine to underscore what is probably a frightening dealing of some sort.

14 (The Birth of the Twins and Padme's Destiny) – Using a few winds, this track starts off in a very dreamy state which continues through the use of xylophones and harps. The music takes a much more serious tone and we hear the familiar chorused theme that featured at the end of the Phantom Menace and played over Qui-Gonn’s funeral pyre. The chorus rises as we hear bits of the Jedi theme, slowed to make it sound desolate, and the track ends as instruments trail out.

15 (A New Hope and End Credits) – The track starts off almost immediately with a slower variation of Leia’s Theme before going into an equally slow Jedi Theme. We hear the familiar Jedi theme again but much closer to the one at the end of Return of the Jedi played over Vader’s funeral pyre. The music swells just as dramatically with ominous oboe like accompaniment to the falling action of the crescendo. In another rarity, the familiar end credits music comes very quickly into the track at the minute and a half mark. It is not the exact same as the other Star Wars end music, but very close with some instrumental variations that is very noticeable to someone who is very familiar with the theme. In typical fashion, the credit music reprises the major musical themes throughout the film while making it all into a whole cohesive track. It also reintroduces themes present in the later films, such as the throne room music from the end of Episode 4 – A New Hope. We also hear variations on the Jedi theme throughout as well as variations on other motifs throughout the original trilogy. We have heard many of these pieces before, but they are a little different.

In conclusion, I must say the soundtrack is rather disappointing. No new themes are really that interesting or memorable, and I really hated the lack of the truly great battle droid invasion theme introduced in the Phantom Menace and expounded upon in Attack of the Clones. Of course, this could be because of the soundtrack, which is always in typical Lucas fashion released with limited material only to be released later in a much more complete fashion.

I also find myself liking the prequel soundtracks much better with time, as if they take a lot longer to grow on me after a lot of exposure to.

However, I do really like the musical pieces from the original trilogy that are reintroduced into this score, and the variations Williams incorporates to make them relevant to this new story. It’s always good to revisit old friends long gone occasionally.

Update: Upon repeated listenings, I must say that I am no longer disappointed with the soundtrack. This film sounds like it's even darker than Empire Strikes Back, so the music should appropriately be underplayed to the visuals and story. While I still think the themes aren't as dynamic as previous scores, they are still powerful on their own. I think there is alot more emotion to this score which would seem to be accurate of the film as well.

The soundtrack comes out on May 3rd, and includes a music video on DVD set to John Williams's brilliant work.

Blog plans

2005-04-10T12:20:00.000-05:00

I should have a review of the soundtrack from the latest Star Wars film, Episode III - Revenge of the Sith up tonight if I'm not too lazy. Updated: DONE

I may also have something to say about a German film I have wanted to see for a long time, called Der Untergang. It was listed here in this blog entry about Upcoming Films.

I have also been working on a bunch of video game reviews. It's taking damn forever though. If I can get everything done today, I will try to bust all of that shit out and come up with a mega blog update tonight.

Post Sin City

2005-04-02T20:32:00.000-05:00

Well, I saw it yesterday. Seeing it in the daytime wasn't as bad as I imagined. In fact, it was kinda nice to have alot of time afterwards.

Before I get into the film, I would like to note the fact that there was not only KIDS in the auditorium, but TWO FAMILIES with kids!! This is a FUCKING R-RATED MOVIE, you idiot cretins, and there is the word SIN in the title! And most likely you are familiar with the source material, so why the hell take the cheapass route out of getting a babysitter for your spoiled ankle-biting carpet monkeys and expose them to such violence, gore, sexuality, nudity, and other good grown-up stuff?? Not only that, but bother us patrons who are old enough to accept the material without gasping or talking aloud through the entire fucking movie??

Ok, it wasn't too bad, but the kids' presence was obvious. What kind of parents are these? Lazy and cheap, that's what!

Anyway, that rant is actually longer than what I am about to write about Sin City.

This isn't a review because I don't know what to say about it yet. I can say I enjoyed it thoroughly, although the aforementioned kids did damper the experience slightly. I can say that the film was extremely well made and very close to the source material. I can also say that the film met my extremely high expectations, but did not exceed them.

Maybe that's my problem. Having read the books several times, this film was nothing new to me at all. I knew every scene, character, and dialogue that was coming. I already knew Sin City, and this film being exactly the graphic novel in every sense, this experience was not so much an experience, but a rerun of an older experience.

There were a few changes, as noted in this thread on the IMDb started by yours truly. Omissions really, to keep the film from being much longer. Rumor is that the DVD will contain the complete story uncut that can be watched on it's own and uninterrupted by other narratives.

I think once I let the film sink and maybe see it again, I can actually write a review of the damn thing.

Mitch Hedberg (1968-2005)

2005-03-31T22:29:00.000-05:00

I was very saddened today by the death of Mitch Hedberg at the ripe 'ole age of 37. Mitch was fast becoming my favorite comedian as I heard him on XM Radio and was instantly hooked by his "Jeff Spicoli" delivery loaded with very witty one-liners and extremely clever observations on the simple things and routines in life. He could take a joke that didn't really land well and make a joke in turn about that which would be even funnier than the original joke! But hell, I laughed at everything he said!

More importantly though, he was funny and sharp as hell. He didn't sound like a bright guy, but he was an absolute genius to come up with the stuff that he did. Maybe that's part of the charm.

When I was reading about him, I found some disturbing parallels to the late rocker Jim Morrison. Like the old Lizard King, Mitch occasionally found himself getting completely sloshed on stage during his performance, so much in fact that he sometimes forgot what jokes he had and hadn't told and had to rely on the audience to help him. One particularly bad incident, he had to post on his website asking forgiveness to those in attendance the previous night and even volunteered to do a free show for them.

I couldn't help but the chuckle at this yet I found myself strangely concerned. I knew his type of lifestyle had ended the young lives of so many bright and talented kids way before their time and I feared this could also happen to Mitch.

Not many details to the cause of his death, but I can't help but to make the obvious conclusion.

I don't believe in a heaven, but if there is one, I hope Mitch is up there knocking 'em dead with a new punchy one-liner. He probably would make a joke about it not making the new CD.

If Mitch becomes lost up there, he should build a house.

"Only in death can we find immortality."

The SITREP (situation report)

2005-03-31T22:03:00.000-05:00

My jogging and consumption of a more healthy diet as well as a ‘restrained’ lifestyle has been proceeding, although this week has seen a significant relapse in that as my job has robbed me of any time- and more importantly, strength to continue. I go to work at 8 a.m. and don’t leave until close to 6 (we are supposed to leave at 5, but the bastards make us stay until they are satisfied) everyday and it is so filled with activity that at the end of it all, I haven’t the willpower nor energy level to want to do anything other than go home and zone out. It’s almost too late then to nap, which would elude me anyway, so I just sit around and surf the internet, play games, or watch movies until 11, at which time I lay in bed and wait for sleep to take me. I get up, and repeat the process with desolate mind and lifeless drive. Next week will probably be several times worse. My store I work in is moving locations, so we the peons, along with a special team designed solely for this purpose, are the ones doing the new store preparations, like moving and setting up products and other menial works of extreme displeasure. I really, really hate it.

About the only thing that has helped me through is the thought of seeing Sin City tomorrow. And that may now be in question as I don’t know who I am going to see this with, maybe by myself, or when. One friend, whose anticipation of seeing this surely excels mine as he has been a longtime fan of the source while I have just begun to get into it, rather see it Saturday or during the day on Friday. Another friend, who seemed to want to see it Friday, now wants to wait until Saturday because of some show or something that is happening on Friday night.

I can’t see myself seeing a picture in the middle of the day. Doesn’t seem right at all. I guess seeing it at night makes the film the main focus of the day, and there is rarely anything that can follow afterwards save for a subsequent visit to the pub to discuss it. Seeing it in the day relegates it to an errand of sorts, something to get out of the way to free the latter part of the day for more important tasks or matters. Hell, I don’t know if I have ever even seen a movie during the day! But at night, it becomes the highlight of the day and the event to look forward to and plan the time prior to around.

But I would prefer that option to the other option of seeing it the next day. I want to be there opening night for this sucker as it is my most anticipated film this year. The next day I have to work so time is an unknown factor, added to the fact that I have to go in on Sunday an hour earlier than usual, and it adds that depressing element of knowing I have to go pretty much straight to bed afterwards to get up early and resume these tasks of ignobility and despair.

It appears to be a no-win situation…as usual.

It continues.

2005-03-16T16:30:00.000-05:00

Today, I went jogging again. I couldn't go yesterday because my legs were really sore, probably a mixed result of both poor stretching and general lack of doing anything even close to exerting for a very long time. I didn't get much in because the track was closing and it was like 40 degrees and raining, which I will probably get a cold from. If I don't, I will be most impressed with myself.

I haven't drank soda since Saturday, which is a world record for me. I haven't eaten fast food lately and have been eating alot of vegetables as well as drinking juices and water. Overall, I am off to a GREAT start!

To be continued...

It has begun...

2005-03-14T20:35:00.000-05:00

Sunday, after eating a can of mixed vegetables and drinking alot of water, I went out and jogged for the very time in my life. I didn't fare very well and left after about 20 minutes. But I knew that since I was just starting, it was going to be small steps. I made it around the track once entirely before slowing into a walk and from then on, would run in spurts for a while.

Today after work, I went there and jogged more. I actually made it about 35 mintues, this time with a lot more running involved. Boy, it's tough. But afterwards, I do feel better. I feel the dawning of a new change in me, like my insides are finally getting their shit together. I have been drinking nothing but water and eating at least somewhat health consciously for the last couple of days. Very little salts, no fast food (which is the toughey!), no beer, and no soda.

Tomorrow, if my legs aren't still killing me, I will do it again. My next goal is to make it TWICE around the track.

I think I can do it.

Hell Day 2

2005-03-10T21:27:00.000-05:00

Ok, this week has been rough and today one of the worst days of Hell.

I get to work and check my pay stub to find out they did NOT put my sick hours in, so it was a little short and I was a little pissed off. I confronted the guy that is in charge of it and he of course blames the computer.

Also some work I could not finish and so delegated to another employee yesterday caused issues today when some people couldn't find some resulting paperwork that had been given to the aforementioned delegated employee. It was eventually found but not before I had to explain the whole long bloody situation (which is a blog in itself suffice to say), not to mention defend myself, to a handful of people who probably didn't believe me.

The worst thing was when I found out I was going to have to work from 8 till 5 instead of till 12:30. This foul-up was acheived through terrible communication and misinformation from a number of sources. I confronted my supervisor about it and we totally had it out for a little while. I stuck by my story (which was legit because I really did NOT know I was going to have to because even the schedule had someone else down to work the later half of the shift I was supposedly supposed to work!) It was interesting to note however that although a resolution was reached, some things about the opposing argument struck me as particularly...odd.

First, her story was conflicting. Initially she said that we had a verbal agreement and that the schedule was done that way intentionally because of some strange 'employee hours' issue. I did not understand that reasoning which was further muddled when she said that the person, a manager no less, responsible for doing the schedule simply...messed up.

I was told different things by different people. In fact, a manager told me the schedule was accurate! And my supervisor did in fact tell me I may have to work the entire shift, but it was a "maybe" and not a "definite" scenario. And this was a week ago and the last I heard of the issue, so I dismissed it. And since the schedule was not altered accordingly, it further confused the issue.

Secondly, when I repeatedly requested a manager step in to serve as intermediary and witness for what I was told, she quickly dismissed the idea, and I detected a sharp increase in her hostility. She didn't want a manager involved. I in fact requested the manager who made the schedule because I have a feeling he wouldn't have known about the issue of my having to work the entirety of the shift AND he wouldn't have been too pleased to find out it would have put me into overtime.

I would later find out she herself was planning on having someone else work for her tomorrow. It was unapproved by a manager, which I suspected the same of my extended shift for that day, so the interjecting of a manager would have put a crimp in her plans.

Not to mention I went until about 5 before getting anything to eat for the whole day. Just a few days back, I did not get a lunch break at all due to yet further bad scheduling and an apathy with some particular employees.

I came very close to marching right the hell out the front door. But I have an ideal that you should never endanger your current situation when the future is not set. I would never quit a job without knowing or securing exactly what I was going to do next. Never.

But to end the story, the situation was resolved (by ME!) and everything looks ok. There does not appear to be any hard feelings, which I know I cannot put faith in, but so far, so good.

Tomorrow, I look forward to completing some very vital errands and capping the night off with a perhaps final (for awhile, at least) romp on the town with some chums. I have the weekend off to enjoy as well.

Latest progress

2005-03-10T21:01:00.000-05:00

I bought my MP3 Player today. It can hold about 40 or so songs. I picked a few good selections from my soundtracks and dance music collection. The dance collection, composed of a few great DJ Irene tracks, should do well as my audio accompaniment.

Tomorrow, I will ascertain my jogging apparel.

Soon...

I'm gonna fix myself

2005-03-08T21:26:00.000-05:00

For the past two years or so, I have been seriously contemplating taking up jogging. For far too long have I felt winded at the slightest of physical exertions. For far too long have I been awoken in the middle of the night by a troublesome heart begging to be strengthened and hardened. For far too long has my blood pressure reminded me that something is truly and seriously wrong with my physical condition.

In high school, I was in excellent physical shape. I could run like Forrest Gump and never get tired. I could do pushups and situps and pullups and jump high and all sorts of things. As I grew, I came under the vices of alcohol and smoking and slowly they took their dreadful effect on my system. Everything that I could once do I still can, but only so much to remind me how very little I can do so now. Fat, something I had never known, became familiar to me and threw a cold bucket of realization on my mind about how fargone I had become.

And now the time to change is here. It must be. I took my first step today and bought an MP3 player case that I can wrap around me. Granted, I do not have an MP3 player yet, but that will be remedied when I get paid at the end of this week. The important thing is that I took that so very important first step.

This Friday, I will fix the MP3 player situation as well as purchase several articles of clothing designed for running. I think throwing some money at the situation will, since I tend to be a conservationist of sorts, help nail subconsciously the need to use the equipment I will be buying for this endeavor.

And so armed with a fighting heart and some good tunes, I will descend down upon a local school to begin jogging for the first time in my life. I am excited and a bit nervous as well. I hope I don't overexert myself and fall dead of a heart attack before I get even a good bit of legging it in. It would be a good waste of money and time.

I know I will have to take it easy for the first couple of days or weeks, hell, I don't know.

I have also decided to alter my intake accordingly. Salty and fatty foods will be out. Fast Foods and microwaveables will be heavily reduced, replaced by vegetables, sandwiches, and fruits. Soft drinks will be eliminated, replaced by juices and an increased intake of water.

Of course, the biggest thing will be smoking and drinking. Luckily, I have decreased my smoking habit from an estimated 5 to 6 packs a month to roughly 2 packs, if that. And that's only during nights of drinking. No longer do I ever light up at work or at home when I am bored. I think there is a definite improvement in how I feel, but weighed with everything else that needs to be accomplished, it's only a dent in the armor.

Drinking will be the hurdle. I think if I can manage to cut the frequency by at first 50%, I will be making a tremendous stride. I think that if I tighten up on the other aspects I have mentioned and succeed in halving the drinking habit, it will be a big difference in the whole grand scheme of things.

On the homefront, I hope to be able to start back up at minor weightlifting which unfortunately never lasts longer than a month or so. I figure I can lift some of those handweights as I lay in my bed and watch TV after a hopefully continued session of some good jogging.

The big thing is always commitment. How focused can I stay on doing this thing? How long before I get bored or give up completely? When will I skip a day and a day turns into a week which will turn into a month followed by forever? It's that first misstep that can be our undoing. I think I have to hit this with the expectation that it's only going to come about around my schedule. I hope to jog at least 3 or 4 times a week. And at least hour or more joggings each. I don't know if that's alot or not, but I have alot to do and alot of making up to do as well.

I hope to be able to start this new health-aware operation by this weekend. I hope to be able to write in a month that I have been very consistent with this thing and the results to my overall health has been nothing short of resounding and amazing. I hope to feel like a new person.

The darkness of the present

2005-03-04T00:05:00.000-05:00

If I were to write my own biography, I would note that my present siutuation is one of the darkest of my times. Coincidently, I am working on a blog where I address the concept in more detail.

This is certainly a dark time for me. The frequency in which I address this is testament to the severity of the situation. I try to maintain positivity, but it grows more difficult as time progresses. My job, as bad as it is, becomes more unbearable with each passing moment. It becomes so that when I work, I am not the same person. I disconnect myself so that I do not become caught in the downward spiral of what transpires. I try not to remember things when I am there, which is difficult to describe. I don't want my outlet of rememberances to originate from there, so that I do not equate existence with that particular place. Although this place I reluctantly call home is not too much better, it is. And it is a better point than my place of work any day.

It all seems like a plan that has gone terribly awry. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't work there. And I certainly shouldn't feel that inevitable darkness that I feel. And when I say darkness, I mean that desperation of a future lost which is defined as a feeling that things will not get better.

I get scared sometimes. I feel panic welling up in me as if a portence to what lies ahead. A panic for the future, if you will. I see myself saying that my dreams are something that never happened, and that is by far the worse personel tragedy that can ever occur.

Something isn't right. This isn't right. I feel another dimension of awareness dawning, being birthed. And it isn't at all pleasant. It's quite the opposite. It's a terrifying feeling, and it has me seriously worried. I feel my desperation increasing and intensifying to extremely deadly proportions. I see no end to this progression. And this is what really worries me.

I feel the awareness...the grasp of what is life, has taken me violently. It isn't happy, it isn't optimistic and it isn't at all good. And that's how I know there is no god. If there was, we would all have a purpose. We would all be born with an inherent drive that would guide us to our ultimate realizations and dreams.

Let's hope things change for the better very soon.

Garden State review

2005-02-24T20:15:00.000-05:00

Like Lost in Translation, Garden State is a way over-hyped movie that packages itself through previews and word of mouth as the next best thing in movies since the advent of color but turns out to be yet another typical genre piece and does itself in under the weight of the prestige and glory it has placed itself under.

This is the formula for this generic romance films:
"Quirky boy comes home after being gone for awhile and meets quirkier girl and they have a rather lame journey together and at the end, the boy has to decide whether he wants to go back home or stay with the girl whom has changed his life."

Once again giving into the hype and going against the word of some comrades, I rented this film for myself to give it the benefit of the doubt. Right about the time the "quirky boy" meets the "quirky girl" in a very "quirky situation", I knew things were bad. It goes from bad to worse when the two instantly bond and eventually get caught up in a little journey around town and of self discovery as they learn to live with their own "quirky" past well enough to be able to love each other.

Like most films of this type, there are little subplots that pay off at the end towards beating the audience over the head with the closure the characters eventually attain through their self-journey. Problem is, these little stories are predictable on their own and seem like nothing other than the scribblings of a student of film script class who knows nothing past the plethora of generic romance/comedies he was apparently exposed to while growing up.

The acting was pretty atrocious too. Natalie Portman has always been hit and miss. As Queen Amidala in the tepid Star Wars prequels, her acting was more of a testament to those films' prevailance of special effects over everything else AND in turn, the poor director skills (as far as acting-wise) of George Lucas whom I can see doing very few takes just so he would have more time to render some much-needed CGI clouds or farting space chickens or something. She was actually very good in Closer; here, I think the filmmakers were just happy to have her onboard and were satisfied enough with her presence not to drive her to the level she is capable of. Zach Braff goes through the film being a quite unlikeable dufus silent-type who I can't help comparing to a heavily medicated Luke Wilson. Iam Holm is wasted in a role that doesn't even look like it was finished fer chrissakes! He just kinda shows up, does some fatherly things to meet the script's quota, and disappears, occasionally popping back when the script writers get a little desperate. Everyone else I really could care less about honestly.

The film also tries to spice things up with these visual moments that, although may sale the film during previews, fail when in context with the rest of the film. Everything is shot rather blandly, so when one of these 'special moments occur', it's distracting and almost seems like the point someone else stepped in to film it. It seemed more like experimentation in cinematography than trying to simply portray something. Just watch the trailer if you don't know what I mean.

Then there are the little oddities the filmmakers used to try to nail the whole quirkiness of their strange little world. The main character drives around on a World War 2 vintage motorcycle complete with sidecar. An incidental character goes to work at a medieval themed restaurant (or something) already dressed in his knight's uniform. Hummm...maybe it would be easier to dress AFTER YOU GET TO WORK?? Portman's character has this odd foldable helmet thing that she has to wear at work because she fell when she had a seizure or something and banged her head. So she already has a helmet when Braff's character offers her a ride on his motorcycle. Add graverobbers and pyramid-scheming shucksters to the mix and you have one wild and wacky little world!

At least Lost in Translation had some good performances and held my interest a lot longer than this film. Plus it actually tried, if failed slightly, at being something a little different. It was definitely more technically and narratively consistent and didn't rely on so many tricks like Garden State to build atmosphere.

Overall, a badly made pretentious film with horrible performances and the worse crime of all, just plain boring.

My "Upcoming Films for 2005" section has been updated.

2005-02-23T19:30:00.000-05:00

Take a look at the link on the right side or just click here.

I'm still alive (sorta, I guess)

2005-02-19T19:42:00.000-05:00

Wow, no update in awhile, huh? Well, not much to write about really. We are almost done with our DVD of Slobot vs. the Minotaur. Really this time. All that's left is to complete the master DVD and that's a mere week or so away. It feels good to get to sit back and wait for someone else to take over things for awhile. As many hours as I put in editing and all that, the reprieve is indeed good.

We've also began preproduction of our new short, "Das Totenfeld". Set during the Great War in Europe, it is a tale of paranoia, fear, and death in the trench from the perspective of Germans. All we have done so far is write a little of it. I myself have already ordered a piece of my costume and whipped up an early poster. We also have a forum dedicated to the short on our website. Not a whole lot of activity so far, but this thing is gonna take awhile.

It already hasn't been easy. I think I noted before how difficult it was just to get permission to even film on the property. After requesting this permission probably 20 times just on one topic topic, it "seems" everything is in order now. Still can't help but to think if that was so difficult - something so simple as getting permission - how difficult is it going to be to actually do this fucker?

On the technology front, I picked up a PDA. I have always wanted one and decided to go ahead as a gift to myself for successfully paying my car off. Also, the $200 gift card given to us at work for winning some contest was but grease under the axles. Or whatever that saying is.

Wow, do I love it! I was going to get a Sony PSP, but considering what features attracted me in the first place, it didn't take me long to realize a PDA would do the same thing and more. Plus, I think I am getting to that age where games just don't hold the appeal that they use to. I guess I don't need it. But what do any of us truly need in this life?

So far with this thing, I can surf the internet, read and send email, play emulation and other games, listen to MP3s, record sounds, watch movies, draw pictures, write, edit, and read documents, have remote control function over TV, DVD players, etc., read ebooks, watch movie trailers, keep track of upcoming events/appointments, maintain contacts, and many other practical things. I decided to even have a list of movies I haven't seen yet want to so that when I visit the rental store, I can always check my PDA and remember what I need to see. It can also serve as a file transport so that I can take - say- edits of movies over to friends houses and we can view them on the PDA or download them to a computer for better viewing. It definitely has the potential to make my life a little more manageable.

I also have seen alot of movies lately. Hopefully, I can get caught up on posting brief reviews of them here.

To forge a future.

2005-02-06T23:49:00.000-05:00

I am sure some people wonder why I am so bitter. Wonder why I take out so much aggression on a single individual. Simple. Accountability.

I hate my job. I hate where I live. I hate how my life lacks purpose or honor. When I help to make these shorts, I feel I get a little closer to that purpose I know I am made for. It may be a long path, but with each accomplishment, that path gets a little shorter. And I happen to be associated with people that match or excel my own level of creativity. I don't find this a mere instance of coincidence. I don't hang out with the people that are constantly on the town or at the big parties. I don't dwell with people that only live for the moment with no regard for the future.

The path I long for leads to a great and glorious future. I see myself making films. I see myself creating things that people will be totally enamored with. I see myself expressing myself the best I can, through moving images. Sometimes reality occasionally checks in and attempts to fill these fantasies with the harshness of a realist and pessimistic ideal, but I overcome them because I find the best weapon is a lack of self-doubt.

Every stupid meeting I have at work, every bullshit complaint my work has against me, everytime I set foot into that place, everytime I try and do a job I have to fake doing, I feel that darkness of a 'normal' life set in. And by normal, I mean simply making your way in a world as minimally as possible without any reach to a world you usually only dream of. The stuff of future regrets. The stuff of sayings like, "I could have been something". We only get one shot at this costumed stage play we call life, and I plan to grab it by the throat and make it give me what I desire and deserve.

Where I live is not necessarily a utopia of opportunity. In fact, if there existed the exact opposite, this place would be it.

So we all make do with what we can. I joined forces with Uterine Fury out of hope I could better myself. And I have. Creativity is like a muscle. The more it is worked, the stronger it becomes and on the inverse, the less it is used, the more it whithers away and becomes a shriveled victim of apathy. I find myself surprised at what I have accomplished, and I don't mean to seem self-absorbed at all. It's similiar to taking up a student and teaching them what you know, and taking pride in what they eventually accomplish. We are our own students, and endeavor and experience become the pride of the teacher.

Anyway, I have greatly strayed from the path.

When I see someone in our group displaying what I can only percieve as apathy or laziness, it greatly angers me. And it tends to ONLY be this one individual. Everyone else really puts their all into it, except the one person capable of more than probably most of us are. And when I bring to light his lackadaisicalness, he gets angry, bitter, and childish. I can't help but to understand his reaction; it's quite common to become bitter at an accusation when we know deep down and perhaps refuse to accept that it is in fact TRUE. Typical human behavior to react negatively. And I think the intensity of the reaction tends to be greater when proportionally compared to the size of our own self-esteem, which this guy has in tremendous excess.

When someone refuses out of bitterness or laziness - or whatever- to equal the contribution of others who are working hard, that's a bump in my road. That makes my path longer. That makes my life at whoring myself for a corporate sales entity longer. When we place so much responsibility into the hands of someone and they fail to realize just how much hope they also have in their hands, I get angry. When they fail to see how much of other's hopes they have within crushing power, I get bitter.

I really hate we have to depend on this one guy so much. He thinks I am holding a grudge from the past. And that is partially true because I have experienced firsthand his idea of concern and consideration and I am not so forgiving to give him the benefit of the doubt for his own change. I know his idea of compassion and selflessness, and it is one I wouldn't hold for my own enemies. My doubt arises from the fact that he seems to continue to trend downward on the scale of effort and contribution. Believe me, I certainly have given him many chances.

I take pride in the amount of my involvement with our creations, as anyone should. But when someone gets in the way of completing those accomplishments, I do not react well, as anyone should. When someone that should be helping accomplish those tasks does just the opposite, I do not react well. I think this is understandable. I have tried to ration with him maturely, but he in turn reacts most immaturely, like a child striking out at having his toy taken away.

I will continue to, as the English say, bugger on. I will continue to have the hope that we the hard working and dilligent will get the recognition we deserve. And those that do not put up the effort will sink downward and away into the abyss of indolence, out of our way and out of our burden.

We get out of life what we put in...and some of us are due for quite a disappointment.

A surprise awaited outside.

2005-01-29T11:35:00.000-05:00

As I woke this gray morning head still swimming with alcohol, I hasted to the window to see if nature had delivered it's promised goods. I was expecting disappointment, but I felt my excitement spill over as I, with great effort and attempt at coordination, made my way to the window. I pulled aside the curtains and then the blinds, and became giddy as a little child as I laid my weary eyes upon this:

I love snow. I love how it changes the small world that we immediately can percieve with our eyes. I love the purity of it; how it makes everything look the same. I love the look of it, especially the way the moonlight sparkles off it at night. I love how it changes everything. No longer are we necessarily free to travel without concern or go on about our day with normal banality. This particular amount of snow we have recieved is rather unextraordinary to many, but for me and the people in this region of the country, it's quite extraordinary. Especially to me.

In late 2003 and early 2004, EVERYTIME it snowed, I just happened to be off for a couple of days. I mean it too. I don't believe I missed a day of work because I was already off! And look at this! Off today and it snows! I think it will continue to snow or at least freezing rain will fall for tonight and into tomorrow. Doesn't look like the temperature will get above freezing either. If that's the case, I may not go into work tomorrow at 7 a.m. like I am supposed to. Damn, that would be a shame....

Future endeavors.

2005-01-25T16:24:00.000-05:00

With the actual film part of the Slobot vs The Minotaur project done and the DVD portion in progress, I think we all needed something to do so we introduced the idea of doing a very expressionistic World War 1 short set in the dismal mud-and-disease soup of a common battlefield trench. It really started off as something else entirely but slowly evolved into the nearly final form it's in now.

We would rely much more on visuals to tell the story, as usual. But this one would be dead serious. It would, if everything goes according to plan, accurately portray not only the violence of trench warfare, but more importantly the assault on the mental and spiritual state of the soldier by the conditions of trench warfare. It is to be a haunting tale of agony and desperation.

Before this, we had an idea to film a series of explosions that would be intermingled with footage of scientists measuring the process and result of such. It would have probably been our most asthetically appealing project but it was not to be as we had gotten our hopes up only to be disappointed by the notion that causing explosions may be a source of intense scrutiny by our government considering the recent terrorist activities. Or at least the father of one of the guys involved with this project who owned the land thought this. And he was probably right. But the son SHOULD have asked about the possibility EARLIER and saved us time and disappointment. It is no surprise I am sure that this guy is the same guy I have written many blogs about. So his extreme lack of consideration or caring is in no need of explanation.

So now I feel the exact same thing will happen. So in order to try and prevent the same disappointment, I posted on our forum asking the guy if we could actually use the same land for this film (and the same land several of our previous shorts were filmed on) because we would be digging trenches and possibly discharging World War 1 era rifles, which may not meet the approval of the owners of the land. So I knew it would be a problem. Of course, the damn guy hasn't answered the question despite it being asked TWO FUCKING TIMES. But he manages to find time to post stupid, pointless, smartass remarks. I have a feeling it will not be approved, and it will be a waste of a good amount of time of preplanning by us as well as an outsider who is interested in being the cinematographer on this project.

Now if we can get approval and do this, great! It would be an interesting project and an opportunity to do something fresh, original, and moving. I and others would put alot of thought into it and I am sure it would come out awesome. It could be our best thing yet.

However, since this same selfish, unthinking, and plain careless guy is the key to finding out if this project is truly on, I am filled with alot of skepticism. He has disappointed many times before, and with what little concern for anything he has left continuing to dwindle, I feel he will do it again. I have long since given up on his contribution in a constant nature, but the others apparently haven't (or they just are too nice to show it) despite numerous times he has demonstrated through deeds his complete apathy about things. I know what kind of person he has become and have no qualms at expressing my utter contempt for the way he acts and treats others. I don't know what it will take to make the others think the same way.

All we can do is wait and see.

2005-01-24T21:38:00.000-05:00

"We never can tell what lies ahead, and when it comes, sometimes we can't believe this is what's supposed to be happening. They say the thing to do is to make the best of the situation, to always dwell on the positives, no matter how overwhelming the negatives. Easier said than done, I say...

No, the thing to do, at least I think, is to hold on. We never know what the future holds, so we can hope...if maybe just a little. We can take pride when we survive the worst life just happens to deal us. And that pride helps us hold on just a little tighter. And a little longer.

I guess that would make my knuckles as white as a ghost.

I wonder what will happen.

I wonder where I will be a year from now.

I wonder what life has in store for me.

I wonder..."

I have always thought the image of a beach was the best metaphor for our life. At least, the hopes in our life. It represents something we strive for, somewhere we long to be, and the ultimate realization of freedom. When you imagine yourself standing just at the tide, sand warm beneath you, sun beaming at your back, that gentle and hypnotizing rhythm of the ocean as it tumbles and rolls back and forth, and you just gaze outward as far as your vision allows. When you see that line where the sky and ocean meet and see that point where the Earth begins to curve downward out of sight, you can't help but to shudder at that thrill of knowing there are many, many lands way past where you can see. That's the hope that lies just past our own horizon. It's there, just out of sight, a good ways away, but...there. And it is filled with endless possibility; a better, brighter tomorrow.

I long for that beach.

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy ZAPHOD pic....

2005-01-20T23:48:00.000-05:00

Homage to a champion.

2005-01-15T03:27:00.000-05:00

Working on something as involving as our latest short with a crew is quite an experience. There is this one guy on our crew who hasn't been in the best of health lately which hits me hard because you will not find a more honorable, more sincere fellow anywhere. He's been very sick lately, and despite this, has put up with our bullshit far more valiantly than anyone else could have. Without him, we wouldn't be anywhere close to where we are now, and for that, I salute him. His patience seems endless and he courageously shrugs off any difficulties we seem to cause with strong tenacity. People in far better physical shape would have long since banished and dismissed us from carrying on what we have for such a long time. He is quite gifted in musical talents and his participation in the production of our short has been extremely valuable in it's completion. Again, without him, we would be nowhere.

To me, he has been a great friend for a LONG time. And he continues to be so for almost two decades later. I doubt I would find a better person anywhere in the world. He is truly a class act and he deserves far more than what life has dealt him. I consider it an honor to know him, and a privilege to be able to call him my friend. And for that, I am lucky. If I were to have any wish fulfilled, it would be that we all gain the recognition for what we have striven for all of these days and are able to live the life of happiness doing for a living this thing here that we all love to do. I would be happy to see him, as well as my other friends, live this dream of mine. It is a short life, and I would like to see it led by a dream's hope.

Best/Worst list of 2004 films

2005-01-14T00:16:00.000-05:00

Best Movies:

Hero
Terrific movie with a wonderful look and kinetic performances. Nice departure from the over-CGI'ed, ego-drenched cliched assembly line movies Hollywood shits out regularly. The score is also equally impressive and is a great listen on it's own. The action is very similiar to that of another great film, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, which is of course unbelieveable and completely enrapturing. I really love this film. Unfortunately, the DVD is rather shoddy in visual quality and lacking in supplements. Also, due to the ill-conceived placement of Quentin Tarantino's name ON THE COVER OF THE GODDAMN DVD, I am sure many people will think he directed or had much more to do with the film than he did. I give him credit because he was responsible for getting an uncut version over here, but I shudder at the fact that the director's credit isn't even listed in the cover.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Only Charlie Kaufman could have made a romantic comedy work for me. This movie is pure magic. Great performances by everyone and an example of when everything in a film works and works right. While very sci-fi-ish in regards to story, the emotion of what is happening is very identifiable and realistic and brought to life by fascinating and dynamic characters. I love how this film folds and unfolds. The truly wonderful trailer had my expectations high, but the film actually surpassed them with flying colors.

Napoleon Dynamite
I wish I had seen this underappreciated and underrated gem in theatres. Very fun and highly quotable film with a refreshing lack of self-awareness. Terrific and memorable characters add texture to an already colorful world. Gosh, you gotta see this! Idiots!

Kill Bill 2
Even better than the first one. While dispensing with alot of the action so prevailent in the first one, this one manages to tell a much better story with much better characters. I found myself much more caught up in what's happening and who it's happening too. I especially love the nods to Sergio Leone (a favorite director of mine and the director whose style I think I match the best) and the use of Ennio Morricone music (who scored many Leone pictures) makes you giggle like a stupid child.

Spider-Man 2
Another sequel that surpasses the original. Director Sam Raimi injects his usual spirit into the material and I think this one represents him a little more. The story and characters are more dynamic and build better in this one and I like the particular focus on duality and the flaws the result. Yeah, whatever. The action is top notch and the fight scenes get your heart pounding nicely. Raimi has nailed this comic book to the screen with pinpoint accuracy.

Collateral
I know many people hate Tom Cruise, but many of those skeptics would be hard pressed not to acknowledge his tremendous effort here. Jamie Foxx, whom I hate personaly, steals the show however as someone who is easily symphatized with. I would say the L.A. night is the real star of the show. Michael Mann's view is mesmerizing and he captures the city's essence perfectly.

Shaolin Soccer
I don't know if this film belongs in this list because it's actually from 2002 but 2004 is the year it came out on DVD and I saw it. I can't think of a movie that is more fun just sitting down to experience. It's crazy and over the top in that way only some Asian films can be but very funny and entertaining. It has some questionable humor which I associate with cultural differences, but most of the jokes and gags hit a home run.

Runner-Ups:

The Passion of the Christ
Mel Gibson's wonderfully shot testament to his own religious faith can be appreciated on the notion that you dismiss this fact and sit back to enjoy a well told and interesting story. Some very brutal imagery made me squirm a bit. This film really made polarities of critics and people alike. Most of the criticism stems from people saying this film is anti-semetic or devoid of proper religious treatment. Since I am devoid of religion, I can sit back and savior in the tremendous visual poetry Gibson has created. He definately has his own style and it is VERY apparent the director of the great Braveheart is the one behind this. This is a rare film where I sat through it the WHOLE time without getting up to go to the restroom or grab some food. Odd that I am that way yet some of my favorite films are religious in nature (Ben-Hur, The Ten Commandments, The Last Temptation of Christ).

The Bourne Supremacy
A good action film with a crazy, frantic pace that grabs you and heaves you through one kinetic sequence to the next. It's more of a thinking man's action flick, with Bourne using guile, ingenuitity, and intelligence to achieve his personel objectives. I enjoyed the first one as well and so far, it really is making the modern James Bond franchise pale in comparison.

Man on Fire
Denzel Washington's performance is what makes this flick good. He doesn't play the typical perfect hero who can do no wrong but instead has flaws and a very spotty past. The film is a little too stylish at times, but that's the director's way and I think it does add some nice energy to the whole story. Not a great movie, but just a plain good and enjoyable action flick.

Worst Movies:

Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
Typical of what is wrong with Hollywood although a noticeable lack of ego and self-indulgence is evident and admirable. I think these guys have a passion; just not the skill, experience, or vision yet. Once the CGi neatness wears off, it's nothing more than a badly written, badly acted B-movie minus the fun. I do think the beginning 10 or 20 minutes is excellent and had the rest of the film been as energetic and exciting, the film would have been terrific. This film also holds the dubious distinction of containing one of the worst endings in film history. (Highlight the spoiler to read ending : Throughout the whole movie, the damsel in tow, who is a photographer, is running low on film and eventually has to decide how to use the last shot. Instead of using the last shot on something important LIKE GIANT ROBOTS OR DINOSAURS, she instead uses the last shot to photograph Sky Captain himself. His last line? [Spoiler - Highlight text to read]"Polly, the lens cap is on". Groan. [End of Spoiler]

Alien vs. Predator
This is from the hack who brought you such wonders as Resident Evil and Soldier. Many people have been waiting on what is the holy grail of versus films and instead of one, we get a terribly generic, boring, and uninspired crapfest. Of all of the material already out there, I don't know why that arrogant director had to go out and make one that is just plain awful. I would say it's laughably bad but I was too distressed over how the material was fucked in the ass with a splintered telephone pole to manage any comedic emotions.

The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
I loved Rushmore but thought The Royal Tennabaums was pretty bad. This film is self-indulgence at it's worse. It looks like very few takes were done with this movie as there are these strange, awkward monents that make no sense and most of the performances, save a few, are downright terrible. There is no focus in the story and everything kinda zips by robbing individual moments of any thought or meaning. The situations in the film are absurd beyond being charmingly quirky and the characters are rather bland and lacking.

The Village
Yet more self-indulgence from a director thinking that whatever he does will be instant film magic. Shyamalan has become dependent on surprise endings and gimmicky filmmaking and this film is a big neon sign to that effect. Usually he is pretty good at building tension, but instead of doing so, in this one he just throws things out there without any kind of building and it looks like the work of a first time film director. This film is not scary nor intense nor even remotely chilling. It's a boring, lackluster, dry attempt at an "intelligent" monster movie and falls straight on it's pompous and boring ass. I do like Signs alot so I still have some respect for his work if not for him (I think he is one of the most pompous jerks around and he already thinks he is Spielberg).[Spoiler] And I couldn't help but to laugh at him dismissively in his terribly smug cameo that was both unnecessary and ridiculous. [End of Spoiler]

Fahrenheit 911
Michael Moore is a fat, stupid lying bastard and you can read how I feel about this propaganda...uh, I mean film here..

The Day After Tomorrow
Typical of Hollywood, the "best" parts were shown in trailers. Once it blows it's CGI Special Effects load, the film becomes limp and impotent. Very cookie cutter crap from the same loser that was responsible for Godzilla, StarGate, Independence Day, and other brainless pieces of crap. I have hated everything this director has done and this is no exception. The script is plain awful and the dialogue will have you cringing.

The Ladykillers
The Coens are some of my favorite filmmakers and they know how to tell a story differently. However, this film is an example of how their quirkiness can go horribly wrong. The movie spends sooo much time building to something and then at the last minute rushes through to the end at a breakneck pace that will have you scratching your head and wondering where the story went. The characters just plain fail to get your attention or devotion and seem like bad rehashes of previous (and better) Coen Bros characters. I still greatly respect the Coens and I KNOW they have much better work ahead of them. Miller's Crossing is one of my favorite films, and I would like to see them give the comedy genre a breather and get back to this type of story.

Brief Conclusion

All in all, a pretty dismal movie year as usual or so it seems nowadays. Hollywood movies, a plethora this year, were kicked in the nuts by more artistic pictures and foreign films and a few sequels actually exceeded the originals. Some previous favorites disappointed while others exceeded their earlier work. It was definately an interesting year if not quality-filled.

SVTM DVD nearing completion. Or is it?

2005-01-09T17:34:00.000-05:00

The latest short is complete. Our other shorts are complete. EVERYTHING else is complete. All we need now is the DVD. Groan.

I know we shouldn't have done it, but we (well, I didn't, really) tasked the one guy who isn't into it anymore to get us some DVD authoring software. A week passes and we have heard nothing from this guy (big surprise there) so I post on the forum asking where it's at. I get a smart ass remark from an anonymous poster (hummm....wonder who it could be) but he posts later saying he can have it the next time we all hang out at where we have to do our post-production work at from now on. We set this Friday night as the final night and I make an itinerary and post it on the forums. I am hopeful it will be our last night. If we can get a master DVD produced, it can be sent off for duplication and we can finally be done of all of this. I am hopeful...but cautiously skeptical.

To add to my skepticism, this guy wants to bring his new girlfriend. No one else but me has a problem with it apparently. I know what will happen. It's the same thing that always happens. So I give up on my concerns (not without a slight fight, though) and Friday night comes.

We follow the itinerary fairly close, skipping around a bit according to what we can do, but we get everything up to the actual DVD part done. We watch the final edit and make changes, we render other projects for the DVD, and it starts to get about 11:30. This is when the guy starts to get up and leave. Now we haven't even started to fucking load the DVD software and he already wants to bail with his girl. I don't say anything because I know it will lead into something possibly violent, and I am not about to fall in that trap and look like the bad guy in front of his girl. As scheming as he is, I know he would use that opportunity to make himself look like the good guy. No one else says or does anything and he leaves. Now 11:30 is extremely early for us. We don't usually get wrapped up until well after 2:00 am. And all of sudden he wants to leave?

Whatever, I think to myself. No real surprise in him doing his usual act of apathy. Now that he's gone, I decide to go ahead and get started on the DVD authoring software because even he said it was tough to master. I guess it would have been good if he had stuck around to HELP US WITH IT. It installs the first part and when I go to install the second disc with the crucial upgrade, nothing happens. So we are stuck with a very stripped down version but I decide to mess around with it anyway. What a useless and completely resultless endeavor. The program is completely non-negotiable. I give up.

Everyone else is pleased with the night's progress as we finally displace a little after 2 or 2:30 am. I am not. We didn't complete our objectives. Our DVD is not done. We are not done.

And for the first time ever, I am starting to lose heart. Yes, we are almost done. But we've been almost done for fucking ever. I am convinced this will never get done. My computer is so slammed with crap and it is very slow because so. I'm afraid and become more so with each passing moment that something will happen and everything we've done will be wiped out. It could very easily happen. It almost has happened.

I think what I am going to do is burn all of the files and pictures and what not on several DVDs and give that along with the authoring software to someone else. As much as I have been editing and prepping and planning, I think this one time I can sit this part of the project out. I have put alot of time and effort into the whole thing, so a reprieve is a very attractive prospect. The only problem is who is going to take over?

I'm not going to concern myself with that. If this thing is meant to be, the resolution will be automatic and quick. For once, it will be nice to sit back and wait to see the product of someone else's labor.

Tonight, I finally get to see The Aviator. I think I'll get some popcorn...

Some short DVD reviews

2005-01-03T13:39:00.000-05:00

Saw Akira Kurosawa's Ran recently. Kurosawa is the master of storytelling. Everything from the characters to the situations are wonderfully imagined and realized and everything comes together in perfect narrative cohesion. I think I actually enjoyed this more than Seven Samurai, which many consider to be his magnum opus. This is a much more recent Kurosawa than many of his classics and it is actually based on Shakespeare's King Lear but with a Japanese cultural flavor to it. There are still many Kurosawa films out there I need to see, but so far I have seen Yojimbo, Sanjuro, Seven Samurai, High and Low and now Ran.

Since The Aviator sparked my interest so much, I found a DVD of Howard Hughes's war film Hell's Angels and picked it up. Man is this movie old. It's a strange fusion of a silent black and white and a slightly colorized talkie. This had to do with the fact that Hughes, being a perfectionist, decided to reshoot so much of the film using new film technology that had just advanced as he shot his picture. The film concerns 3 friends as the first World War begins to break out and how the war determines their immediate paths in life. While the acting and non-aerial action is quite dull and poorly done, the picture becomes absolutely amazing when the film gets of the ground and into the hot skies of WW1 air combat. I was awestruck at alot of the dogfighting sequences and it was interesting to note that Hughes himself had to do some of the aerial work when other pilots refused to out of safety concerns (they were right as Hughes ended up crashing). Some of the scenes are truly magnificent and definately worth seeing several times again.

Cannibal Maniac is an independent short by our friends from Warped Reality Pictures. It's about a strange little device that inflicts anyone unfortunate enough to come across it with a not-so-desirable desire to violently ingest human flesh. The gore effects are very well done and overall, the picture is really good with nice use of heavy metal music and well-done cinematography. It's a very entertaining little romp through some craziness and it probably will disturb you with it's gore and violence, as it should. If I had any complaints, it is that some scenes are a little too long and could have been cut slightly for pacing. But it's a minor issue when everything else is so well done. The guys responsible for this are real nice people and we enjoy knowing and working with them. Their DVD does feature some of our own shorts as well as music videos and various extras. Their next short is called Acid Bath and we at Uterine Fury Records look forward to it.

Upcoming films for 2005

2005-01-01T19:19:00.000-05:00

Note that some of these films are from last year and are being included because I haven't seen them. I will be updating this as I think of or become aware of other films.

The Aviator - December 25, 2004
Hard to go wrong with Martin Scorsese. Critical and personal acquaintance word of mouth has been very, very favorable on this one. I had a good feeling when I saw the trailer and that awesome shot of Hughes walking away from a plane he just landed. I am a sucker for biopics even though I know this will be heavily "Hollywood-ized". But I don't think it's possible for one film or anything to accurately capture the enigmatic and larger-than-life existance of Howard Hughes but this one should give us a little taste.
Trailer

Batman Begins - June 17, 2005
Awesome cast including Christian Bale as the Dark Knight and other notables such as Morgan Freeman, Liam Neeson, Michael Caine, Ken Watanabe AND Gary Oldman. The Director Christopher Nolan has had an impressive body of work so far. Really looking forward to this one. Batman has sucked royally since Joel Shitmaker raped the franchise's childhood. I kinda wish this story would take up from where the films left off and already leave the established story in place but it's probably very tempting to use origin stories to take up so much running time. I have a bad feeling though that Nolan will try and reinvent the wheel with the source and in turn, come off as self indulgant as he falls on his ass. But the opportunity to see the great Gary Oldman doing something other than pyscho badguy role number 343,626 is worth it by itself. This is casting against type at it's finest!
Teaser
Trailer

Be Cool - March 4, 2005
I liked Get Shorty alot and Travolta really, really needs a hit after his career keeps diving deeper into the shitter. Stupid title though. Vince Vaughn's in it.
Update: I recently saw Get Shorty via the new Special Edition DVD and it made my anticipation for the sequel increase slightly. Chili Palmer is just such a cool character. Like Tom Regan from Miller's Crossing, he just knows how to play sides while able to take control of a situation if it goes violatile. And Travolta is really magnificent in the role. Fits him like a glove.
Trailer

The Brothers Grimm - November 23, 2005
It's about time we see another Terry Gilliam movie. I don't think there is a Gilliam movie I have seen that I didn't like. It's a real shame when true talent like his isn't able to do what he wants when he wants yet true talentless hacks like Michael Bay, PWS Anderson, Uwe Boll, and Roland Emmerich pretty much have free reign in that Neo Babylon that is Hollywood. Oh...back to this film. It's been pushed back and has probably been plagued by difficulty like every other Gilliam film but if he's able to work his usual magic, this one should be one to watch out for.

Doom - August 5, 2005
Love the game an the script is supposedly good. Hope they can capture that dark, frightening feeling of desperation, isolation and...well, doom that the games wonderfully convey. BUT video game to film success has been extremely low. I don't know how I feel about the main character being named 'John Grimm' though. I think they should just call him what everyone on the Gamespot forums calls him; Doom Guy. This needs to be an R-Rated blood-splattering action-oriented slugathon.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - May 6, 2005
Love the books and the world Douglas Adams created. I don't like some of the changes in this version but Sam Rockwell as Zaphod will certainly rule because Rockwell fucking rules. First of all, they have a fucking rapper playing a main character. Maybe Mos Def will rule, but I hate this new trend of giving musicians these plum roles and I am sure actors hate it as well. Secondly, some of the designs of the ship and Marvin have me a little worried. The Heart of Gold is supposedly to look like a space submarine yet in this movie, it appears to look like a goddamn mechanical volleyball. And I know that Marvin should have mental power the size of a planet but does his head need to also almost equal the size of one? It's a shame that Adams isn't alive to see the final product.
Update: Now there are some reviews out there as well as an official trailer. So far, the reviews have been very, very positive with only a few little story flaws that supposedly can be fixed in post editing. Seems when they stray from the book, things get a little flat. Yet when they really nail aspects from the film, it is pure magic. Hum. Not an unreasonable equation.
As far as what I can gather from the trailer, Mos Def is definately going to be a weakpoint. Just be careful who you say that to as you'll probably be accused of racism. : ) The trailer is poorly constructed and tries to sell the film as some sci-fi action/comedy fest a'la Men in Black when the concept and story is way more complex and better quality. They even use Aliens and Men in Black music in the trailer!
Teaser
Trailer

Shi mian mai fu (House of Flying Daggers)
Hero was one of my favorites of last year and alot of the same people involved with that one are involved with this one. I really love these types of films and it's good to see Hollywood getting it's ass kicked by foreign films. I'm sure this film will LOOK great too. I think this is just a tip of the iceberg of what Asia has to offer us in terms of film and I hope in the future more stuff will be accessible.
Trailer

The Machinist
Don't know too much but it's got Bale in it and he's awesome.
Trailer

The New World - November 9, 2005
The Thin Red Line is, in my opinion, a tremendously underrated masterpiece and this film seems to embody similiar meditative themes and qualities. I need to make a mental reminder to see Terence Malick's other films and soon! Jeez, it looks to be the year of the Bale.
Trailer

Ocean's 12 - December 10, 2004
I really like Steven Soderbergh. He's got an impressive body of work with a few recent mistakes notwithstanding and I think he still has some great work in him. Ocean's 11 was a terrific, fun little heist flick with some fun little performances and alot of style. With the huge rage of remakes nowadays, it's refreshing to see someone remaking something that was not very good originally. Jonathan Demme should have taken note. However, I have a bad feeling about this one. A terrible premise that threatens the point of the original film and bad word of mouth makes me reluctant to see this film which is why maybe I haven't yet.
Trailer

Oldboy - 2005
This is another Korean movie that looks very interesting. Us Americans should get this some time this year although it's a film from 2003! From what I heard as well as what I gathered from the trailer, this film looks dark, gory, and powerful. It's about a guy that's held captive inexplicably for 15 years and is suddenly released, only to discover he has 5 days to track down his captor or a fate even worse than his previous imprisonment awaits him.
Trailer

Ong-Bak - 2005(?)
I am having a hard time finding out when this is coming over here. This is yet another film from 2003 that we may just finally get. From what I have read, it isn't a very good film story wise, but who the hell sees a high octane kung fu movie for it's plot or character development. No, the real hook for this film is how goddamned realistic the fight choreography is and how authentic all of the physical stuntwork looks. I saw a brief making-of a long time ago and experienced complete jaw-drop at what I saw. Watch a little stunt promo here.
Trailer

Sin City - April 1, 2005
So far, I am ecstatic over this one. Never read the books (that will change when 6 of 'em arrive from Amazon.com in a week or so) but the trailers have been incredible. Great cast too. Hopefully Robert Rodriguez will redeem himself after some crappy films. I love the look of the film which is close to the book and I love how the characters are realized. Frank Miller, creator of the graphics novels this is based on, even has a director's credit which is a great sign! This film needs to be dark, violent, and sick. Hey....Mickey Rourke!
Update: Now that I have read 6 of the books (although one of the most important ones , The Big Fat Kill, still eludes me!), my excitement for this film has blown up! It has moved to my number 1 most anticipated film for 2005. Alright, Rodriguez. You have some huge expectations to surpass. So far, it looks like you are on the right path as I have not seen anything to make me think something is amiss (except maybe the fact that Jessica Alba, despite being a stripper, does not appear naked *sob*) and your dedication to the source material is probably the best example of such I have ever seen. Anyway, this material is rich, dark, violent, and brilliant. I am on my second reading of the books I am so enamored.
Trailer
ComicCon footage

Star Wars Episode III - Revenge of the Sith - May 19, 2005
Low expectations on this one. I am a huge ORIGINAL trilogy fan but the prequels have left me cold and limp. I think George Lucas is insane, personally. But word of mouth is that this one will be the darkest of all Star Wars films and the best of the prequel trilogy. We'll see. Hayden and Jar Jar sucks and so does Lucas's overdependency on special effects. Just for starters (it would take several internets to contain my rant on Lucas and what he has done) , the old films LOOK better. More realistic and tangible because they DID EXIST in models! These films are just masturbatory ads for ILM.
Trailer

Steamboy - March 18, 2005
Katsuhiro Ôtomo pretty much introduced me to the world of anime with his groundbreaking Akira. Without him, I wouldn't have been exposed to great films like Record of Lodoss War, Ghost in the Shell, Macross Plus, Wings of Honneamise, and many, many others. If nothing else, it will at least be visually stunning.
Trailer

Taegukgi (Brotherhood of War)
We don't see or hear much about the Korean War which is unfortunate. But here we have a Korean film about the Korean War. I have heard really good things about this one.
Trailer

Der Untergang (The Downfall)
Being that I am obsessed with World War 2, this film looks amazing and should be right up my alley. Great trailer really makes the film look well made, acted, and directed. Great word of mouth on this one. You tend not to hear much about Hitler's last days. As the Russians closed in on Berlin, Hitler was out of his mind and drugged up. Let's hope Bruno Ganz can summon the most of madness to accurately convey one of the most fascinating and evil men of all times. I am very excited about this one.
Trailer

War of the Worlds - July 1, 2005
One word : Spielberg. It's interesting how Spielberg vowed never to portray aliens has hostile (see Close Encounters of the Third Kind and E.T.) yet this movie is pretty much the be all end all alien invasion flick. Spielberg certainly has redeemed his career as of recent so we will be having high hopes with this one.
Trailer

2004 saw the completion of Slobot vs. The Minotaur

2005-01-01T15:48:00.000-05:00

I am pleased to say that, despite many, many problems, we did manage to complete our latest short. Regrettably though, our CD/DVD release will not be until very soon this year because of reasons I will not go into.

It's going to cost a pretty penny because instead of 4 people paying equal share as per the original plan, only 3 will be doing so now which is disappointing. I don't want to have to pay more because I am not rich, but some moron posted the idea in our forum so it's kind of hard to say no to that and look like the bad guy. Now I completely understand why it must be this way, don't get me wrong, and I completely understand the situation, it's just hard enough to make my way in this world financially as it is. Personally, I think the genius that came up with that idea should pay the other guy's share seeing as to how little he's contributed moneywise to the entire production.

This year was also reason to celebrate as I paid my car off. I know it's ironic to mention considering what the above paragraph says, but I have alot of stuff to pay off which I plan to this year. Also, due to many problems with the production, I was planning on buying my own digital video cam so that we would have complete access if we ever do anything else in the realm of short films. Don't know if that's going to happen but it would be nice. Very nice. I am going to have to really think about and discuss the possibilities of future shoots in order to decide whether or not to purchase one.

Those two events are about the best thing to happen to me for the year of 2004. Soon I will post my plans/expectations/hopes for the year 2005.

And 2005 came... with a whimper, not a bang.

2005-01-01T14:59:00.000-05:00

In an attempt to top last New Year's celebratory viewing of a stand up routine by Carrot Top, this year my friend and I were led under false pretense (the promise of single ladies) to a party that, in an unfortunate and what could have been a potentially violent twist of events, turned into nothing more than a couple's party, completely devoid of any female targets altogether. Paper noisemakers sounded our hope's death knell.

Quickly withdrawing strategically after midnight, we drove around an empty and depressingly dismal town only to find several bars closed or underwhelming. Finally, we settled at a rather low-key bar to drink the sorrows of this night away. In between drunken glub glubs, we discussed the future of our website and short films and make failed attempts at devising strategies to getting our work known and seen by people of power or influence.

Interestingly enough, I ran into the former owner of the bar that tragically closed down not too long ago and mentioned in this blog. What he would tell me about that event would be a very interesting parallel to what has been happening to me as of recent.

It basically boils down to his former partner and friend betraying him on ownership of the bar. But where the parallels can be drawn comes from the fact that a friend, acting completely selfish and deceptive, managed to destroy not only a long friendship, but a place that can be(or was in my case) considered home (or a place to congregate, as the case with the bar). To add even more bizarre coincidence, the former friend of this guy even has the same name as my former friend! When we were friends, we frequented this bar many, many times and so was on very good friendly terms with the owners.

As the night worn on and he filled me in on the details of that betrayal, I was reminded of the old saying of how small the world can be and I was made uncomfortable at the coincidence unfolding before me. This year has been filled with strange coincidences like this and I cannot help but to be swayed towards the feeling that, as I experience more of these coincidences, the events in this world are not simply random, disjointed, and unplanned occurances. I think back to the last paragraph of this blog.

And now, the day after yet another largely unfulfilling night, I am occupied with the thoughts of how to spend it properly.

Boredom lingers like a stench of staleness...

Nights like this...

2004-12-17T23:46:00.000-05:00

It's nights like this that I really miss my apartment. Here I am, on a Friday night, stuck in this tiny, hot, cramped dungeon of a room paying way too much monthly yet enjoying much less freedom than I should.
In my apartment, I could buy some beer, have some friends over, and do whatever...watch movies, edit our shorts. It was...fun. And I was truly free.
Now I can't do that. I barely fit in this cell, much less several people. I feel confined. In my apartment, I could hang out on the balcony or in the living room or my own room. Here, I have 1/3 of the choice.

I don't know how much longer I can put up with it. I feel like I am getting claustrophobic. Sitting on my bed all the time to watch TV, watch movies, or play PS2 gets really old really fast. No room to really breathe. Half of my stuff is somewhere else.

Jeez, I am not happy here. At all. Everyday I come "home", I feel like this should not be happening. I feel like this can't be right like I will wake up and be in my apartment and everything will be fine. But that won't happen. I barely get a signal with my cellphone and there is no landline here, so if I want to call someone or recieve a call, it's usually a failed attempt unless I go outside. The wireless network I have here sucks because it likes to disconnect for a couple seconds 10 or 20 times a day. I can't set up my surround sound 5 speaker setup because it would be too loud and there is no room really to do so.

I don't know what to do....

The Story of Last Night...

2004-12-13T22:02:00.000-05:00

Well, not really. It's actually the story of night before last. It was the reason behind my previous warning blog..

To begin, this blog where I outlined my worries about our DVD struck a nerve. Apparently, the person I spoke none-so-highly of is a regular visitor here, although his purpose is not to merely peruse, but to pick up on anything that may relate to him. I guess you could call him a spy. He is also my former roommate, so that should shed some light on the type of person he is to the more than casual visitor to this here blogspot.

Anyway, he read what I said and got himself in a big hissy fit. Now the night in question is Saturday, so some of us decide we can get some more material ready for our DVD. But we need the camera that his dad has. So as usual, plans are posted on our website's forum and I go on about work waiting for a reply.

Now I owe this guy some money for rent. We haven't been talking at all and it was mainly because of how he chose to inform me of his desires to move out (or lack of) so I didn't pay my part of rent, which I know was bad. But I had every desire to pay him back, and he even knew it. We had made rough plans on how I was going to at the party that resulted in this blog. But to get revenge, he posts on our website with an ultimatum; pay him IMMEDIATELY what I owe him or we do not get use of the camera.

Now you would think since he's been involved in our production of our short film Slobot vs the Minotaur, he would be as eager as the rest of us to get this DVD done. But...no. Instead, he PUBLICLY posts my debt to him (which of course was a private matter), uses the camera and our need for it as leverage, and gets the whole UFR crew caught up in this ridiculous and overblown situation. I respond rather harshly at first but put out an offer to pay him half, as I had fully planned on doing anyway. I wanted a quick resolution to this issue because I wanted to be able to work on our DVD, dammit!

He declines my offer in his response and continues to further drag more detail of our private matter into public light. He makes incorrect assumptions and blows the situation even more out of proportion. I read it and totally lose it. I reply in force and do not hold anything back.

Now, the UFR head honcho has to act like a UN ambassador between two nations that are at the brink of nuclear war and if his efforts fail, the entire world will be caught up in a violent catastrophe. So he begins private negotiations with the other party in an attempt to reach some kind of treaty that will prevent total and absolute destruction. Now while the details of that negotiation are unknown to me, I can safely assume having to deal with the other party (as I have dealt with in the past) was probably an exercise in extreme frustration and annoyance. And it's alot more telling when you think about it that he needed to be negotiated with.

I get an offer. I can write him a check for half now and write a post-dated check for the other half to be cashed next year. Now I have borrowed money from him in the past (and he always has a tendency to make this debt known to others like it's empowering to him for people to know someone is indebted to him) and always paid him back. So the fact that he responded in such a way is very telling that the motive was purely revenge. His huge ego, inflated to such extreme proportions that the very fabric it is made of is stretched dangerously thin, was bruised and he lashed out in the only way he knows; childishly.

I accept the offer, despite the obvious humiliation factor, in the name of progress for our DVD. So we do manage to get alot done, which was worth all this trouble in the end I guess, and our completion gets closer to reality.

Treaties were stricken, wars were abated, and armaggedon was staved once more. Progress was the peace although any chance for future relations was the casuality.

But I can have some hope that the true nature of this person will be known not only to me, but to the others he has made victims of with his inconsiderate and immature actions. That night will be a night of revelation.